Excuse me, I say to the hardware guy at that store I hate.  I need some, umm, silicone, uhhh, lubricant.

He looks up, one eyebrow raised.  Mmmm-hm.

Yeah.  So, um, it's for our toilet.  Because we have a toilet with, um, well, it doesn't have one of those ball things, but it has this thing that goes up and down.  And that thing is stuck and it's not going up and down anymore, and so my husband (I just talked to him and he looked it up online) thinks that silicone lubricant will fix the problem.

Uhhhh...  eyebrow no longer  raised, but both eyebrows are now knit together in a look of, what is that, feigned concern?  Or is he just trying not to laugh at me?

Actually, I'm not sure that he's really sure that silicone lubricant, um, exists.  (As to myself I think, "But I'm sure he wouldn't even think of sending me on a mission to that store I hate to ask a strange man for silicone lubricant if he wasn't near certain that my chances of actually finding such a thing were pretty good.)

Um, yeah.  Well, I don't know that we have that, uh, here.  Why don't you go and ask the guys over at the automotive desk.  Just go right up to the desk and ask them for what you need.  I'm sure they'll be able to help you.  They know where all that stuff is.  (And you can bet your soccer-mom you-know-what that as soon as you are out of ear shot I'm going to call the guys in automotive and laugh my a** off when I tell them what you're looking for.)