Une Voiture

Because I Couldn't Make This Stuff Up

2008-10-27T20:09:00.002-05:00

The other day we were talking about the annual All Saints celebration at A's school. Instead of dressing up in "traditional" Halloween costumes, each kid chooses a saint, researches him/her, then dresses like that saint for Mass and a "treat walk." A will be St. Patrick this year. I've made a rather kick-a** costume. I digress. A was telling J that when she gets to kindergarten, she will have to choose a saint to be.

A: You'll have to be a GIRL saint.
J: Like Sleeping Beauty?

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A's teacher has instituted a new system for charting their behavior and schoolwork each day. It's essentially a calendar, and they color the day according to how they did that day. Green for "good," yellow for a "warning," and red for "better luck tomorrow." I asked A who determines what color they get each day, and he said that the students decide. What happens, then, if the teacher disagrees?

A: What do you mean?
me: Like, what happens if you think you had a "green" day, but Mrs. K thinks you had a "red" day?
A: Well, I, uh, think we do "rock, paper, scissors" or somethin'.

Money Well Spent.

2008-09-26T17:15:00.002-05:00

Wednesday is Mass Day at A's school. Every Wednesday evening we ask how Mass was and he always says, "Good."

This week, D asked him how Mass had gone. Here's how it went:

D: How was Mass?
A: Good.
D: Well, what did Father talk about?
A: Ummm...I don't really know.
D: Well, do you know what the Gospel was about?
A: Uhhhh....I think it came from Luke. But that's probably just a guess.
D: Oh. Well...
A: I usually don't pay attention during Mass.

So, at least he's getting the virtue of honesty.

Because it has to be said.

2008-09-03T15:41:00.003-05:00

Yes, I'm a Republican. No, I don't line up 100% with the party. Yes, I'm one of the energized, re-committed individuals who finds the nomination of Sarah Palin intriguing and fantastic. I've been caught up in all the news reports too. No matter what one's political persuasion, as a woman (and no, not a feminist - whatever that term means to you, I don't think that word describes me), and a working mother, I think the chance to have that unique perspective on the national level is hopeful. Something about all the coverage of the past 5 days has kind of rubbed me raw, but I haven't been able to put words around what exactly has gotten under my skin. But I read this today, and it sums it up. At least mostly.

It's a reminder that the Mommy Wars debates are largely had by people who can afford to spend a lot of time theorizing in op-ed columns rather than trying to put gas in the car and food on the table. Feminist liberal moms sometimes choose to stay home while evangelical moms sometimes have to work; they may not want to, but a study I once wrote about suggested they feel less unhappiness about finding a "work-life" balance than their feminist peers do. It's a psychological truism that people who judge you are really reflecting something of their own anxieties. Why else, in the supposed age of gender equality, do we respond with the same old Pavlovian frenzy when the mommy-isn't-at-home bell is rung instead of stepping back to ask: How can we change our culture so this is a decision that falls equally to mom and dad? How come feminist-minded journalists don't take male politicians to task for how they run their lives but get in at arms when a conservative mother chooses to run for national office? As Anne pointed out, isn't this ironic? Whatever the problems I have with Palin’s politics, her decision to run for VP as a mom with a young kid is not one of them.

It was posted by Meghan O'Rourke at slate.com. If you happen to go to that site and read most of the other things written about Palin there, I will admit that I don't usually agree. But I think this quote is right on.

First Day of Preschool

2008-09-02T18:39:00.002-05:00

Well...

Today was the day that J started school. Preschool. I'm glad it finally got here, because now the anticipation of it is all over. Because seriously...it's only been within the last month that she has agreed to go to preschool in the first place.

This morning she woke up and was raring to go. She announced to D that she needed a good breakfast because "It's a big day for preschoolers, Dad."

I walked her in to her classroom and turned in her paperwork. I stood amongst all the other (good) moms who had remembered to bring their cameras (I thought I was doing really well to remember the tissues, paper towels, and emergency medical forms). Kids were clinging to their mothers...some were crying, others were clearly apprehensive.

Mine? She walked about 5 steps into the classroom, turned around, flashed me a HUGE smile, and threw me a wave. "BYE!!!!" she yelled.

My mom says it's a sign that she's well-adjusted and trusts that we're going to be there when she's done with school.

To me, she could just as well have said, "Get the hell outta here, Mom! Don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out!"

2008-07-24T20:50:00.002-05:00

Our fantastic priest, pastor, and friend, has started a blog. Interesting, since he's the very last person I'd expect to do such a thing. He's an eloquent writer and knows so much about so many things...it will be an enjoyable read! I've linked him in the sidebar.

Why?

2008-07-09T19:36:00.002-05:00

...haven't I started doing laundry in preparation for our trip? We leave in two days, and I haven't done laundry, really, since 2 weeks ago. Thank chocolate D did some while we were away last weekend, or we'd all be out of underwear.

...am I sitting upstairs, thinking about how I'm going to go downstairs to the family room to read my new book, when I know that the light bulb in the lamp behind the couch is out and I won't want to turn the overheads on to read, but I'll forget to take a new bulb with me when I go downstairs?

...are all the pay-per-view movies (a luxury, I might add, that we have JUST NOW become familiar with - totally crazy since it's way cheaper and easier than planning a night out at the movies and hiring a sitter) that we want to watch starting at either 7:00 (too early) or 9:30 (no chance we'd stay awake)?

...can't I keep my car clean? Oh wait. I know the answer to that one. The better question is why my children insist on carting loads of crap into the car with them every.time.we.leave.the.house, and then leaving everything in the backseat when we get home?

...am I losing my resolve to keep the boy off the Wii this summer? I mean, he gets exercise, I suppose, and I guess in some sense it's better than him sitting and watching cartoons or whatever...I guess the fact that it's on TV that makes me feel like I should be all anxious and concerned. Perhaps it's just particularly bad this week because it's been rainy, and during the times it hasn't been rainy, the neighbor kid's been on vacation. And gee. We're going on a Wii-less vacation in two short days. Hm. I can talk my way around anything.

We're off to the north woods this weekend. Two whole weeks away. Sand, water, cedar trees, only occasional internet access, and long sunsets over the water. Pinch me now.

It's a Good Thing She's Cute

2008-07-03T17:23:00.002-05:00

...most days, it's her saving grace.

We're fighting strep here. As in strep throat, that illness that most people get during the winter. I've had it precisely one time in my life. My son... twice in the last month and a half, three times if you're looking at the last four months. Now the girl has it too.

She keeps telling me her "fever hurts, right here in my mouf," while she opens her mouth to say "ahhhh" and breathes her stinky, strep-y breaf all over me. Dang, it's a good thing my kids are (knock-on-wood) generally healthy. I'm good at being a doting, spoiling, I'll-get-you-anything-you-want, Mom, for a little while. But if this went on for days I'd be in trouble.

She just came to me at the table weilding a package of fruit snacks telling me that she really needed them because "they're good and they make my fever froat go away."

Perhaps it was that she smells fresh from the bath she just got after she threw up all over my bed (oh, did I forget that part up above?), perhaps it was her big blue eyes and her pink flushed cheeks, but man was she cute and absolutely impossible to refuse.

Thought Provoking. And Funny.

2008-06-03T07:25:00.003-05:00

OK. Here's another reason I like being Episcopalian. No requirements to live in a yurt and have my hubby follow me to work (or me follow him). And believe me. I get as far away from the bathroom as I possibly can when he's in there. 15 feet would require me to remain within the shock zone.

Interested now, aren't you?

Pat Benetar Makes Good End-of-Year Music.

2008-06-02T19:28:00.002-05:00

...as in "Goodbye To You." Oh yes, one might think that the song refers to a nasty breakup, but stick any kid's name at the end of that line of the chorus, and it makes the perfect song to blast at eardrum-crushing decibel levels on the last day of school. Not that I did that, mind you. Nor any of the preschool teachers. Nope. Nuh-uh. I'm just thinkin'.

Yes, it's done. School year is SO over, save one inservice and one workday. The most brutal spring of my tenure in the public education system, and a caseload that was a little more than I bargained for, both in numbers and severity. A year of pregnant co-workers, a move at the holidays, and changes upon changes.

Tonight is the second best night of the year...second only to Christmas Eve. It's going on 9:00 and still light as day outside. The whole summer stretches out for the next 2.5 months or so, with vacation smack in the middle. I will not set the alarm clock. I will not rush out the door with breakfast in my hand. I will drink my coffee from a real mug, not a vaccum-seal travel mug. I will take my kids to the zoo and the pool and to visit our new cousin when s/he makes his/her arrival. I will enjoy our house and our yard and get a decent tan.

Anyone who doesn't do this school gig is really missing out.

You Know It's Time to Get Caught Up on Laundry...

2008-05-11T20:08:00.002-05:00

When your six-year old comes out of the laundry room, shirtless and clutching a T-shirt, and asks..."If I took this off the really high pile, does that mean it's clean?"

2008-04-30T19:55:00.002-05:00

I had 9 meetings today - meetings for which I had to prepare a lot of paperwork, and meetings that required a lot of mental presence because they were with parents who fired out lots of questions, plus they were back-to-back, every half hour, all.day.long.

I have 4 more meetings tomorrow, for which I have even MORE required paperwork (does the government think that I think they really read all the paper I produce? Because I'm smarter than that.). I have 4 reports to write, 1 IEP to produce, then 6 more reports and 1 more IEP for the day after tomorrow.

And I really suck right now because I'm watching Food Network, blogging, and catching up on celebrity gossip instead of doing my work for the moment. That means I'm going to be up later than I should be, and probably up earlier in the morning that I want to be, in order to make up for my current procrastinating (oooohhh!! Idol is starting!!!). It's all a little frighteningly like college.

But my bedside table is littered with notes from my 6 year-old that say things like "I love you," and really, that's enough to make just about anything in life worth whatever it takes to accomplish it.

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I looked through A's bookbag yesterday and found a note from his teacher that talked about an "unfortunate incident" that happened in the class yesterday. Apparently one of the kids used a "very foul" word during their work time.

me: A, there's a note in your backpack from your teacher...
A: (recalling the terror that befell him earlier this year when he had a note home addressing his behavior)...What?
me: Well, I guess something happened in your class today. What happened?
A: "X" said a bad word.
me: (thinking furiously to come up with a way to have him tell me what word was said without him actually having to say the word) ummm...can you tell me what the word started with?
A: Yeah. It started with "f". And it wasn't F-A-R-T.

Farts are Funny...And Other Things I'm Learning

2008-04-20T13:49:00.002-05:00

We're there. That point in time when all things gross become funny, and our young school-age child brings home the vocabulary of his classmates. We are now inundated with comments like "That RULES!" (the other night, it was pizza with no sauce that "ruled") Somewhere along the way, he's decided it's hilarious to say the words "fart," "butt," and "armpit" as many times per day as he can. The other day I bribed him with a couple of dollars to accompany me to the dollar store to buy dog shampoo, and he picked out a can of "noisy putty," which is simply slime ("AWESOME!") into which you jam your fingers (getting better!) in order to elicit a farting noise (...GALES of laughter). It's another one of those times when I keep thinking that God blessed me with a little boy as some sort of test.

Other things we're learning this spring:

Bicycles (training wheels and all) are so extremely frustrating in a driveway with a little bit of a slope. And even though the bike helmet is pink with a cat on the side, it's still not the most comfortable thing.

We have really great landscaping put in by the previous owner that is now greening and blossoming and turning our front yard really pretty!

IEP season does NOT, as I had hoped it would, get better each spring.

1.8 acres is too much to push-mow.

In the battle of Sod vs. Seed, sod is winning.

Eating outside on our deck is perhaps the best way to end a day. I envision draining many bottles of wine out there this summer. Mmmmmmmm.

Saturday.

2008-03-29T05:21:00.002-05:00

And I was up before 5:00 AM. There was snoring, there was early child rising and needing the bathroom, there were snacks that needed to be made for after today's soccer game. I was grouchy. And I'm still grouchy.

But a little less so, because even though she got up before the crack of dawn, the girl is now wandering around wearing a craft-foam crown with a big red plastic jewel on the front in PJs from last fall that are just a teeeeense too small. And she went over to our family Bible, where she found an engagement picture of her father and me and she said, "There's Daddy! He's my chicky-baby! And there's Mommy! She's my punkeroo!"

So now I believe if I can just get a hot cup of coffee I might be able to shake off the grumpiness and get started with the weekend.

Dinnertime Conversation

2008-03-05T08:24:00.001-05:00

me: J, what do you want to be when you grow up?

J: ummmmm....nothing. I just want to fly a big kite.

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well, I suppose that will save us a lot in college costs.

Been sitting on this one a while.

2008-03-05T08:23:00.000-05:00

We had a snow day on Wednesday (number 8, for anyone who is keeping score). J had an appointment in Columbus, A had school, so the girl and I went to the big city for a little doctoring and a little shopping. We went to a big, new, suburban mall and I immediately knew it was a mistake.

As D said… “They were all there, weren’t they?”

The “they” to whom he was referring was the army of perfectly coiffed, manicured, svelte, smiling mothers dressed in their designer clothes and fashionable shoes. I dodged strollers containing perfectly-behaved children with trendy names who were snacking on healthy finger foods, all the while dragging my asthma-afflicted, wheezing and hacking 3 year-old to the big department store to buy some pillows and an electric griddle. We had a little bit of “girl time” to eat lunch in the food court, where I was made to feel like an awful mom because I work and can’t bring my kid(s) to mall playdates on a daily basis, plus I’m far from trendy, don’t wear designer clothes, and probably do a lot of other things of which my children ought to be ashamed. I watched moms speak in sing-songy voices to their children who were climbing all over the food court furniture about how “that’s not OK,” and nary a cross or stern word did I hear. All the while I felt smaller, and smaller, and less worthy and more like an awful mom because I occasionally (OK, frequently) lose my cool and use a tone of voice that I shouldn’t with my kids. I don’t always explain to them why climbing on a public table where other people eat their food is “not OK,” I just bark out the order to “GET DOWN,” and they get my drift.

Oh. And I forgot all about the little girl in the doctor’s waiting room who was no older than J (3, for those of you keeping score) and dressed in the most adorable little matching outfit of dress, tights, and mary janes (the snow outside was about 5 inches deep). She danced around the office waiting room and her mother announced, “I know this looks like a nice big place that would be so fun to run in, sweetie, but you can’t. It’s not OK.” Then she proceeded to guide the little girl over to a chair, pull a book out of the child’s monogrammed backpack and say, “Now, let’s look and see what continent you’re missing.”

Are you even kidding me? Freaking CONTINENTS?! Seriously. Did that woman think that I was interested enough to care that her preschooler knows the continents? Am I supposed to be impressed? With the child? Or the doting mother? Am I supposed to feel like less of a parent, or that I don’t love my kids, or that my kids are doomed to a life of failure because they haven’t mastered world geography before they enter school?

So sorry. But I can’t bring myself to limit J’s imaginative play with her princesses and dollhouse so that I can teach her basic math facts and state capitals. I won’t make A read books prescribed for him in place of the Pokemon books that he clearly enjoys much more. I refuse to inject myself into their happy play schemes and self-designed constructs just so that I can “feel involved.” I will not insist on their mastering academic skills because someone else makes me feel like I have to…and at the expense of their childhood.
RE-freaking-LAX, PEOPLE!! Because you make those of us who do not engage in hyperparenting feel as though we ought to, and our kids would not thank you for that. And they certainly wouldn’t be better off for it.

Hi. Ummm... 'member me?

2008-03-05T08:17:00.002-05:00

Wow. It's just been busy. Loving the new house. Not so much loving the snow days. Great at first, but we're on day 9 (that's make-up day #4), and frankly it's getting old. Plus it messes with my schedule big time and makes me crabby. And I want spring to get here SOON because:

a) I can't take A running into our bedroom before 6:00 every morning asking "Do I have school today?" and asking "Well, do I have a two-hour delay?" when we tell him that school's in session. Seriously. The boy stayed home more than he went to school in February, and I can't remember the last time he actually had a normal 5-day week with no delays, illness, closing, or holidays.

b) The snow is getting SO old. It's beyond fabulous to have a driveway and garage when the weather is like this, but that driveway needs to be shoveled and that's kind of a pain...reminiscent of my suburban childhood when every snow day was wrecked by having to shovel the driveway.

c) D, A, and I have all had the UR virus. I'd like for the weather to turn before we run an even higher risk that J will get it.

Off to a day of shopping with my girl and my sisters-in-law. What? Me hate snow days? Who said that...?

So. Unbelievably. Tired.

2008-01-01T19:36:00.000-05:00

We’re in. In a manner of speaking, that is. D was home today and we got a lot of stuff put away and unpacked. We’re pretty much down to a few boxes in the living room and, well, the whole master bedroom and bath. Ugh.

I’m finding that everything - EVERYTHING! - takes longer than I start out thinking it will take. Who would even think that it would take an entire day to unpack and organize a kitchen? Half a day to do a dining room?! And it’s downright exhausting. I’ve been going to bed early - and tired, and sore - every night since we arrived.

OK. Griping done.

Aside from what I've just said, I LOVE OUR HOUSE!!! I keep waking up thinking we’re on vacation. I love to cook in my kitchen (hello, convection oven!). I love our view and our yard and our garage and...well, everything about being here. It’s fabulous.

Time to help kids clean up the playroom. (Holy crap! A playroom!)

Moving Day

2007-12-27T08:08:00.001-05:00

So.
Here I sit among piles and towers of boxes...Christmas decorations...toys...clothes...dishes...

Everyone else is gone. D to work, the kids with my mom to the new house (after breakfast at McDonald's. They probably want to move every stinkin' day if it means they get to eat fast food for every meal and pizza for dinner...). Annie and I are here in the quiet, waiting on the movers.

It's so weird. I've literally waited and dreamed and planned for this day for about 8 years, the last 5 years in earnest. And now that it's here, I'm sad at the prospect of leaving this home. And yet, I'm so excited about our new home and the memories we'll make there...

Moving is an intense amount of work. It's intensely stressful. I find I can't make even the simplest decisions after deciding what needs to go to the new house, what needs to stay, what needs to be donated, what is trash. I can't imagine making this transition alone...or under the sad circumstances that sometimes cause people to uproot and move. The light at the end of the tunnel for me is the excitement of a newer, bigger house with all of its little pleasures.

I think I hear the truck trying to park outside. Annie to the crate. Computer away. Time to go.

Just Another Day...

2007-12-13T18:53:00.000-05:00

The essence of my job:

student: Dod tart wi d.

me: What?

student: Dod tart wi d.

me: What?

student (now vigorously pointing to the picture and the word): Dod tart wi d!!

me: OH! Yes, dog starts with "d". Sorry...I just didn't understand what you were saying.

student: I fink dat why I here.

Trappings

2007-11-18T11:04:00.000-05:00

I stayed home from church today. D hauled the kids off to Sunday School and 10:30 worship. I stayed home to "finish" the basement. The packing, that is.

Throughout this whole process, and even as we've anticipated packing and moving over the past several years, I've warned D not to be too sentimental. "Do you really need to save that?" That box of photos, that folder of certificates, those cards from friends... How quickly I had forgotten that my own box of "do you need to save that"'s was downstairs. I just haven't looked at them in quite some time. Photos from friends' weddings. A varsity letter from marching band. Embarrassing photos from high school dances. Photos of relatives no longer living. Letters from parents when I was a freshman in college. Notes from roommates.

To be honest, I'm glad I was here by myself and could take the time to look through these things. As I picked and chose through which things to keep, I became aware that those things that are truly mine - all mine and no one else's in this house - can now neatly fit into one moving box. When I moved here nine years ago this week, I brought all sorts of things that seemed so important. Box after box of "stuff." And now, it's down to one box. It seems strange. So much of me is poured out into being a wife and a mother and a teacher...that those things that remind me of my life before those roles have dwindled into just a few precious possessions and memories.

I can't help but think that after I tape up "my" box of special items, no one will ever see the things inside until that time comes when we move again. And since we have no intention of moving until A & J are on their own, my treasures will stay hidden for years to come. I wonder what they will mean to whoever opens them up years and years from now.

The Deal...

2007-11-15T21:30:00.001-05:00

...she is done. And this will be our home in just 30 days.

Yes, after looking at house after house for the better part of the 9 years we’ve been married, we finally found one that we love...and today it is ours!! Well, sort of ours. Mostly the bank’s, but a little bit ours.

It’s almost a little hard to contemplate. And truth be told, I am just beginning to get a little sad about leaving our house. It is, after all, the place where we brought the two babies home. It’s the last house D’s dad knew us to live in. It’s the house that saw us through a master’s degree and a traumatic pregnancy. It’s where we had our fun double-income-no-kids time before the kids entered the picture. It’s the bachelor house D bought before he ever knew me. It’s our starter home. It’s where we began to figure things out.

As much as I don’t like to admit it, I want a home I can be proud of. I want a big kitchen. I want my kids to have a playroom and a big yard. I want to stop dragging bags of groceries up flights of steps from the curb. And for all of that wanting, I don’t want our home to be anything but warm and welcoming and a place where our family and friends know they can come and relax and be loved and be comfortable. I want more than anything to create that. And for the first time (really), I see how our hard work and devotion to things that we love doing is allowing us the ability to provide this place for our children and families.

And so we move ahead...figuratively and quite literally. We take possession in a few weeks and plan to officially move in and make this our home just after Christmas. In the meantime we pack and sort and purge and cleanse and look forward to one more holiday in our big old house. A house we have loved and filled with memories. A house we have been blessed to outgrow.

Puppy Prozac

2007-11-08T21:35:00.000-05:00

Well, great.

The dog is apparently suffering from “separation anxiety,” which according to the vet is not all that uncommon for a “high-strung” breed like the Airedale. The kids never even went through any significant periods of separation anxiety.

And now we’re going to have a dog on Prozac.

I mean seriously. What does she have to be stressed about? Her job doesn’t involve meeting state and federal guidelines or saving lives. She is not responsible for any other being (animal, human, or otherwise). She is fed and watered without asking. She is allowed to sleep in the largest portion of the king-size bed. She doesn’t have to drive, pay taxes, or clean toilets. She can sleep the whole freaking day away if she so chooses.

But noooooooo. Now we have a 50-pound terrier with a canine psychological complex. Just as we’re heading into the holidays and getting ready to move. So whatever. But if she doesn’t get herself straightened out, she best keep an eye on her happy pills. Or the mama may just be sneaking some.

All Saints 2007

2007-10-31T18:19:00.000-05:00

My kid goes to Catholic school. Every year his school forgoes the annual Halloween party in favor of a celebration of All Saints Day. So this year, there was no rushing around to find the perfect Halloween costume for school. No worries about elaborate multi-piece outfits or how to explain (again) that carrying guns, swords, or other assorted weapons, does not sit well with his father and me. I didn’t have to stay up late worrying about how to turn a pair of fleece pajamas into the ideal dinosaur or where I was going to find the pattern for a cowboy’s vest. There wasn’t a thought given to which shoes would look OK with that Indian get-up.

Nope.

My challenge this year was how to turn my son into the world’s smallest Franciscan monk.

The choice to portray St. Francis was long thought out. He began by wanting to be St. Michael (his middle name), but balked at the idea of dressing as an archangel. St. George seemed to be a great option (“He slays dragons!!”), but not so much after we nixed the carrying of a dragon-slaying sword. He settled on St. Francis because, “He loved the animals.”

He doesn’t have me fooled. Being St. Francis means that he gets to choose his very favorite stuffed animal to take with him to Mass tomorrow as part of his costume. Which begs the question…

Did St. Francis love the dinosaurs too?

Ahhhh.

2007-10-11T20:01:00.000-05:00

Finally some validation for us non-anxious, not perfect, not even half interested in making it appear as though we’re perfect, tired, overworked, I can run a household with one hand tied behind my back because I balance a career and a family...moms.

I read these pieces today and thought...YES! What’s wrong with a little independent play? What’s wrong with being honest with my kid and telling him that I have dinner to prepare, a meeting to get to, or laundry overflowing every hamper in the house, and that while all that is happening the last thing I want to do right now is pretend to be interested in toys? I’d rather my kids develop imaginative play on their own, to develop relationships with one another, and to explore the outdoors. Make the occasional mess, get filthy, get scrapes, and keep innocent secrets from us. I’m not interested in being my kids’ shadow just so that others perceive me to be the involved and caring parent that I know I am anyway. My kids aren’t interested in video games. My kids would rather go outside and play in the dirt (more often than not without me!) than do anything in the world. My kids ride bikes and scooters and take walks and haul crap around in the wagon until we drag them kicking and screaming inside for baths.

My kids also know that weekends are sacred family time, that family dinner time (especially on Sundays) is the norm - not a special occasion, and that they are loved. They also respect that their father and I have responsibilities outside of our home that occasionally take priority over our immediate involvement in their play schemes, and that when we do get down on the floor to tickle, play, build, read, and imagine with them...our hearts are really in it.

2007-10-04T18:04:00.000-05:00

I decided against cooking dinner tonight. That’s how it started. I had to go pick up something for a student at a place right next to a restaurant that we like, so I decided to order carry-out.

E-mail was down at work today, and I had emailed D earlier this morning to see if my plan was OK with him, and he hadn’t responded...or I hadn’t gotten anything because email was down.

My cell phone has been dead for over a week.

So I wanted to check with D and make sure he didn’t have other ideas for dinner. But...no email, no cell phone. What’s a girl to do?!

Riiiiiight. I looked for a pay phone. Um...has anyone else noticed the alarming lack of pay phones around these days? (Oh, yeah, that’s because everyone has cell phones. Did I mention mine has been dead for over a week?) The gods of telecommunication must’ve been looking out for me, because I located a pay phone.

Then I got incensed over the fact that it cost FIFTY FREAKING CENTS to make a local call.

Then I got more incensed over the fact that the pay phone didn’t even work, and probably hasn’t worked in a very long time, because seriously - who uses pay phones?

Then I was just mad at myself for not charging my own phone, and mad that I got mad about such stupid little things.

I went to the mall, underwent some retail therapy, came back to the restaurant and picked up our carryout, got the kids, and came home.

And plugged in my cell phone.

Not really.

Six.

2007-10-03T19:08:00.000-05:00

My boy. You turned six today! With joyful anticipation and exuberance you came into our room so early this morning and asked in a hushed whisper if, since it was your birthday, it was OK to come in and snuggle. I know that you just wanted to move the day along to that moment when you could tear into your birthday presents, but I wanted to have a few quiet moments to remember that day six years ago when you came to be a part of our family.

You don’t like hearing about the details of the day. You grow embarrassed as I blink back tears and swallow hard as I remember the moments of your birth-day. I suppose you won’t ever understand, until that day when you welcome your own first child, just how mysterious and hopeful and magical and frightening and overwhelming that moment is. And that’s OK. For your mama, it’s OK to go to a quiet place of remembering each year on this day. I remember how drastically different life became after your birth and how, although it is painfully cliche to say, I would never again be the same.

Perhaps this birthday is for me the most difficult yet. This year has brought so many changes to our lives and we’re still very much in the swirls of adjustment and upheaval. This year I’ve had to give a little more of you away, and I’ve realized that as you grow, I will be sharing you. I will be sharing you with your teachers and your friends. I realize how desperately I want for you to be happy more than anything else in the world. I also realize that a mama will always wish to be the everything for her child, but as you spend more time away from me and from our family and home each day, you will need to have others along the way.

It’s as it should be, I suppose. I want you to learn and grow and figure out just where it is you fit. I pray each day that you will be gently guided to good people and spirits around you and that your life may be shaped by them. I hope that you can be a good example for others.

Six years ago this night we welcomed a wide-eyed little bundle into the world. You made us change and grow in ways we could not have begun to imagine prior to your arrival, and each year brings more growth and change and wonder. You amaze us every day, and as we continue to grow together, I’ll continue to need your patience (and I promise to continue trying to be patient with you). I will watch as you spread your wings a little more each day (but I will secretly wish in some small part of me that I could hold onto you and keep you as my own forever).

Thanks for making me a mom. Happy birthday.

I wonder if he knows he married a renaissance woman

2007-09-15T20:22:00.000-05:00

My activities for the day included:

baking homemade cinnamon rolls (from scratch, the yeast kind)
recycling (with the whole family...and the dog)
hauling my car in to the tire shop to have the blown out tire replaced (the blown out tire that, yes, I’m convinced I could have changed all by myself had that gentleman not shown up to help me)
repairing plaster
making the most divine portobello burgers for dinner
taking A to enjoy the last night of our county fair...and the last heats of the demolition derby

Sometimes I don’t even believe all the crazy that is my life these days.

2007-09-08T21:29:00.001-05:00

It's been a long time since I laughed so hard that I cried.

Tonight, this did it. And I'm not exactly sure why.

Perhaps we just need to get out more.

Football season again!

2007-09-08T18:22:00.000-05:00

You didn’t seriously expect that I wouldn’t post about this, did you?!

And then there’s this!!

I told my sister-in-law that surely this must be the end of the coaching road for cousin Lloyd, but she thinks that I'm predicting the wrong kind of outcome. "Seems to me," she said, "that he's working out just fine for you guys!"

Doug took it upon himself to pen this in celebration:

"and it came to pass that after Bo descended into Sheol and after a short time, his children and his children's children began to rot, and they did smell with a stench that did reach into the highest heaven"
--- from The Song of Washtenaw 39:7

With the most sincere and hearfelt apologies to my Wolverine friends.

NOT!

2007-09-07T17:45:00.000-05:00

Excuse me, I say to the hardware guy at that store I hate. I need some, umm, silicone, uhhh, lubricant.

He looks up, one eyebrow raised. Mmmm-hm.

Yeah. So, um, it's for our toilet. Because we have a toilet with, um, well, it doesn't have one of those ball things, but it has this thing that goes up and down. And that thing is stuck and it's not going up and down anymore, and so my husband (I just talked to him and he looked it up online) thinks that silicone lubricant will fix the problem.

Uhhhh... eyebrow no longer raised, but both eyebrows are now knit together in a look of, what is that, feigned concern? Or is he just trying not to laugh at me?

Actually, I'm not sure that he's really sure that silicone lubricant, um, exists. (As to myself I think, "But I'm sure he wouldn't even think of sending me on a mission to that store I hate to ask a strange man for silicone lubricant if he wasn't near certain that my chances of actually finding such a thing were pretty good.)

Um, yeah. Well, I don't know that we have that, uh, here. Why don't you go and ask the guys over at the automotive desk. Just go right up to the desk and ask them for what you need. I'm sure they'll be able to help you. They know where all that stuff is. (And you can bet your soccer-mom you-know-what that as soon as you are out of ear shot I'm going to call the guys in automotive and laugh my a** off when I tell them what you're looking for.)

Ch-ch-ch-changes

2007-09-01T05:47:00.000-05:00

The boy started kindergarten last week. Here in our town, everyone goes to kindergarten all day, every day. The only option for half-day happens to be at his school, but we thought that all day every day school would be good for him. He tends to find trouble when he's not occupied, and since he's reading like a freaking nine-year old, we were happy to be able to send him to a stimulating environment 5 days per week.

It's gone well. We are so happy with our choice of schools, and he seems to really like it as well. So far we really can't complain or wish for anything better for him (except the clique-y PTA, but that's quite another story). He's handled the transition pretty well, and aside from being so tired that he walks around resembling a drunk in the evenings, he loves school.

The transition to having a school-aged child has been a little difficult and surprising for me. I realized this week that I really have not much of an idea what's going on during the day with my boy. We rely on his stories and any communication from his teacher to let us know what (and how) he's doing. We're quickly learning that he's not the most accurate of historians, and of course we don't get a daily rundown of his every moment from his teacher. That's fine - I don't really expect that. But it's hard to make that leap. Harder than I thought it would be.

The other thing we're trying to figure out and manage as best we can is the absolute exhaustion brought on by school. A has always been one that requires a significant amount of sleep, and school requires an early wake-up time. I figure he goes full-tilt all day long, and when he finally returns home at the end of the day he is noticeably wiped out, and usually quite irritable. So we've bent our usually strict rules on TV watching, and we send him outside frequently because as long as he stays really busy he isn't consumed with how tired he is. We let him watch stupid cartoons and do far more vegging than previously. Perhaps it's not the best strategy, but right now we're just trying to adjust and get by. We play sleep catch-up on the weekends and try to keep the schedule low-key.

And that's what's happening here. We're head-long back into the school schedule, and while at some point this week I felt certain it would completely kick my a**, we're managing. More changes are coming - a new office for D, perhaps a new house for the 4 of us. It's 10 shades of crazy around here.

2007-08-30T20:54:00.000-05:00

Dear Lord,

If anyone is still interested in what is happening in our little corner of the world, please bless them especially. Especially if they’re trying to find out what’s going on in our little corner of the world by checking in here at this blog. I’m trying, Lord, to keep up. But with the boy having started kindergarten (oh my! there’s a post all in itself) and the girl that refuses to potty-train and the darlings at my own school who seem to have drained every last ounce of energy out of my body, I know that you know that I’m busy. And so tired. And so if you could just send them a sign that one of these days I will get around to posting about all the “nothing” happening around here and just how I feel about that, I’d so appreciate it.

Amen.

No one is normal.

2007-08-14T21:04:00.000-05:00

At least not in this house. Not even the dog.

The Airedale got spayed yesterday. She stayed overnight at the vet, then we picked her up this afternoon. The vet provided us with a sheet of post-operative information, and at the bottom was a hand-written note.

"You'll notice that Annie's incision is a little longer than normal," the note said. "Annie's reproductive tract was unusually long." (I hadn't noticed. I wouldn't know a normal-sized spaying incision from any other kind, thankyouverymuch.)

I only hope the dog didn't hear that. Because truly, the last thing we need around here is a dog with a complex.

Happy Birthday!

2007-08-11T14:47:00.001-05:00

Happy third birthday to the J-Bird!

My girly-girl, my snuggle bear, my sometimes owly little one.

I can’t believe you’re three.

Do you know what you did today to make my heart melt? As I picked you up out of your high chair after lunch, you said, “You know what I need from my mudder? A kiss! Here you go! --mwah!--”

You’re always saying things that are so deliciously cute. I love the way you still reach for our “megawk” when you cross the street. I love that baby word that has made its way into your “big girl” vocabulary, carried over from the days when you insisted on “me walk” all the time even though you required assistance in the form of a grown-up finger to hold on to. I think forever I will be calling pointer fingers ”megawks.”

My current favorite in your playlist of adorable sayings is “uh-po-pa-be.” You are more than willing at all times to let everyone know what they’re “uh-po-pa-be” doing.

Three has always seemed to bring the end of toddlerhood. You seem to be full-on little girl now. I remember when you were born that I wished I could look ahead to your third birthday and see what you would look like, how you developed, and what kind of little person you would become. At the time of your birth, when we were facing a terrifying unknown that never came to be, I never could have dreamed up the wonderful little girl you are now. You are a blessing.

Thank you for providing the lion’s share of the laughter in our house. Please keep your spark, your fire, your...you-ness as you grow. Your daddy and I love you very much.

In which I withdraw my name for consideration for Mother of the Year

2007-08-02T21:17:00.000-05:00

Two words...

Toddler. Scissors.

’Nuf said.

You Can Always Count on Those Liberal Arts Schools

2007-07-28T14:14:00.001-05:00

Not that I wish to further any political opinions here (ahem). But wouldn’t you just know it that a fellow alum from my well-respected little liberal arts college managed to further someone else’s?

It’s Time for Soccer!!

2007-07-27T14:34:00.001-05:00

2007-07-27T06:13:00.000-05:00

We were talking about school this morning.

D: J, are you going to go to school someday?
J: No. I just want to be ballerin-da.

Bliss

2007-07-26T05:31:00.000-05:00

It’s early morning here at Chez Voiture. Everyone’s still sleeping. It’s so blissfully quiet and peaceful in our house I had to sit down and make note of the occasion. It doesn’t happen often that the children sleep past 6:00. Or that I’m awake enough at 6:00 to actually get up and be human, let alone contemplate some things that I could do around the house. Usually the morning hits me in the head (well, the boobs, actually, as one of the kids absent-mindedly bounds into our bed), and then I’m thrown into the day with nary a moment to think.

I prefer this morning’s quiet way better.

See, I was completely frazzled and snappy last night and went to bed feeling awful. The kids had an unusually difficult day and by the end of it (to use one of my favorite phrases) I had one shredded nerve left, and they were swinging from it. Fast forward to this morning, when I woke quietly to the soft morning light rather than to a knee into my belly. I looked down at the dog blanket on the floor at the foot of our bed and noted J’s two favorite stuffed animals. Knowing that they wouldn’t be there without her, my eyes adjusted and focused enough to make out her sleeping little body curled up on the blanket.

D woke long enough to look at J, then he slipped back off to sleep. A’s still in bed.

The peace, quiet, and stillness of this morning are doing wonders for my spirit.

Will it go 'round in circles...

2007-07-19T16:04:00.000-05:00

Isn't there an old song with that title? Like I think the next line is something like "will it fly high like a bird up in the sky..." I'm expecting D to post the answer...

Anyway. Get this completely circular conversation I had with J this morning as we were leaving the store:

me: Let's hurry guys...it's going to rain! Ooooooh wait...it already is raining...
J: Is it raining?
me: Yes, J.
J: Why?
me: Because. But it's OK, because we need the rain. The plants and the grass and the trees. And my car needs to be washed off.
J: Does your car need to be washed off?
me: Yes.
J: Why?
me: Because it's dirty.
J: Is your car dirty?
me: Yes.
J: Why?
me: Because it's been really dry and dusty here and my car has gotten dirty. But now the rain will wash it off and make it clean again.
J: Is your car getting wet?
me: Yes.
J: Why?
me: Because it's raining.
J: Is it raining?
me: Yes.
J: Why?

I imagine we could have continued on ad nauseum, but thankfully we arrived at the car and I buckled her in the car seat while I unloaded our loot into the trunk.

Andi & Daniel 7-14-07

2007-07-15T19:50:00.001-05:00

There just really aren’t words for the beauty of the weekend. It was amazingly moving to watch a dear friend marry the one who is so right for her, and to watch him adore her. The setting was perfect, the moment was unspeakably magical.

2007-07-11T21:23:00.000-05:00

It’s really just a whole lot of nothin‘ around here. I mean, not really. This is the busiest week of the summer so far, culminating in the wedding of one of my best friends (read: a WHOLE weekend alone with no kids!). A has been at an arts camp during the days this week, so I’ve had the rare opportunity to be a one-on-one parent to the J-Bird. Mostly it’s been delightful. Except for her new favorite word: “Nope.” Everything is “nope.” It is so beyond the cute stage and about knee-deep into highly irritating.

In preparation for the big wedding and bridesmaid’s dress with spaghetti straps, I’ve been hitting the self tanner pretty hard. Like, twice a day. It’s just to fill in tan lines, but still. The smell gives me a headache. D just rolls his eyes and laughs at me. He apparently doesn’t see the warning signs of addiction.

I’m realizing that beyond the self-tanner, it takes an awful lot of hard work to get this old post-childbearing body into some semblance of shape where I will look at least somewhat decent baring my arms in public. I’ve been soaking my feet in the hopes of eliminating callouses (so far, no dice). I’ve been painting nail strengthener on my nails. Daily. Every time we go to the pool I walk the fine line of tanning a little more without burning. I dug through my drawer today to find the most appropriate mostly-lycra piece of undergarment apparel that will hold my flab in and still allow me to breathe, and I’m still having the hose vs. no hose debate (so far, I’m still leaning fairly strongly toward no hose. I suppose if I don’t buy any and don’t have them in the suitcase that will answer the question, right?).

Frankly, I’m exhausted.

I did, however, find the most adorable pair of flip-flops to wear at the reception. I realized the moment that I was asked to be a part of this wedding that uncomfortable shoes were going to be part of the deal, so that’s my compromise. Pinchy sandals for the ceremony, flips for the reception. And the bride is totally OK with that.

Now. If I can just get a haircut that is as cute as the one Annie got today, we’ll be all set (check out the badass smirk!).

Sometimes They're Funny

2007-07-09T20:51:00.000-05:00

...and it's a good thing. Sometimes it's their only redeeming quality.

Today's funnies:

I was trying to do some shopping (for clothes. And I had to try them on. And the children hate dressing rooms.). J was in a stroller until we got into the dressing room, at which point she climbed out. When we were getting ready to leave the dressing room, I told her she needed to sit down in the stroller. She shot me a look that would've killed a lesser mother and told me with all the serious anger she could muster, "I'm not sitting in the stroller. And that's PINAL!"

Tonight at dinner, A's face lit up and he said "Guys!! I know what we can do with sis! We can send her to college to learn how to make Doritos!!"

2007-07-08T08:26:00.000-05:00

D on call.

J up from midnight until 4 AM.

For NO APPARENT REASON.

I was forced to eat chocolate cake for breakfast.

***Edited: After lots of thought, I'm thinking the coffee that was in the chocolate cake I ate for breakfast that we had for dessert the night before might possibly have been the reason for J's non-sleepingness. Note to self: no caffeine for the toddler. It may not even be a good idea when she's an adult at the rate she's going.

2007-07-04T08:54:00.001-05:00

This photo seems to capture a lot of what the summer’s been about. A with that ornery gleam in his eye, wondering what he can get into next, and J with her two-year-old face, wondering how whatever A gets into next will bother her and how much she won’t like it.

Bye, Baby... and a Good Day All Around

2007-07-02T15:48:00.000-05:00

I realize I run a huge risk of jinxing myself by declaring this the best day of the summer so far, since it's not 5:00 yet, neither child has had a bath, I've not made dinner, and I'm conveniently omitting the unfortunate dog-diarrhea incident of this morning. BUT. This has been the best day of the summer so far. The weather was perfect. The kids and I spent the majority of the day outside...we took a hike, went for a long bike ride, played soccer, ran the dog around, and blew bubbles. D made it home for lunch. The kids are filthy from a day of hard play and they're happily, quietly playing right now as they wait to go up for baths. Quite honestly, it couldn't get any better.

----------------------

This weekend we bid goodbye to babyhood at Chez Voiture. I painted the nursery and we magically changed it into J's "big-girl" room, complete with a twin bed and play space. Aside from the fact that scraping wallpaper and painting is a job I always loathe, this particular makeover was pretty difficult for me. I didn't realize until I looked in on J sleeping in her new big-girl bed on Saturday night for the first time that I'm not quite ready for her to be done being a baby yet. I remembered so well the day we put the nursery together six years ago, and something in the deepest corner of my heart ached as I watched my youngest take this small but important step into big-kid-ness. She's done well with the transition and really seems to enjoy her new room. I enjoy it too, even though it means that I won't be putting a baby in a crib in that room ever again. But life moves on, I suppose, and they will grow up. And honestly...as long as it means she's not sleeping in our room, the big-girl bed isn't so bad.

2007-06-29T13:06:00.000-05:00

That last post was so whiny. I don’t have much to say right now, but at least I’ll attempt to say something nice!! (Grocery shopping continues to be a huge pain around here, though...)

Big news around here is that we’re making J’s transition into the “big-girl” room this weekend. I’m painting tomorrow and hopefully we’ll be able to pull it all together and get a bed and have the whole thing done with. I began to realize that if we didn’t manage to pull it off this weekend it likely won’t happen this summer. How’s that for depressing? Anyway, I’ve done my best to prepare her for the change. She’s not one to manage big changes very well, particularly if she perceives that she’s being prodded along in making the change. She’ll be picking out her own bedding (and I realize that she may well try to choose dinosaurs or dump trucks or neon-pink princess warriors...), and I’ve chosen a painting scheme to truly turn the nursery into her very own space.

And about that...I’m a little sad, honestly, although I’m ready to say goodbye to the green walls and Noah’s ark. It’s just a little hard to swallow that I painted that room for A six (!!!) years ago, and now we will not be needing a nursery ever again. I was just saying that I love the kids at their current ages. It really is wonderful to see them growing up. I just wish they could do that without, you know, growing up.

-----------------------------------------------

This summer I have realized how absolutely much I love making lunch for my kids. When I used to be here by myself, I wouldn’t give lunch a thought, and oftentimes would go without. But I find it simply lovely that children need that break and mid-day nourishment. I love sitting down to lunch with them, and I love the challenge of putting together colorful lunches of foods they enjoy. Oddly enough, I find myself thinking more about a balanced meal at lunch time more so than at dinner. That’s not to say that they don’t eat their fair share of PB&J. But I like that it’s PB&J made by me, in the way that I know they like it, and balanced with some other, more nutritious things alongside. It’s one of the most satisfying things I do all summer.

To the Lady Who Bagged my Stuff at WalMart:

2007-06-25T12:20:00.000-05:00

All right, dumbass. Strawberries are fragile. They do NOT belong UNDERNEATH 8 ears of corn. Yes, I realize that the strawberries were not of the freshest variety, but they were the best that your store can seem to stock. So I paid my ridiculous per-pound price and took them because I need them for a recipe.

I hate your plastic bags. They do not stand up and keep my items contained in the back of the car. I really, really hate your plastic bags when you over-stuff them so that when I go to unload my groceries from the back of the car, the bags split open and my not-so-fresh strawberries go spilling all over the street in front of my house.

Bread is even more fragile than strawberries, and I have particular people in my household who do not wish to eat the bread that was squished nearly flat because you put it in the same bag as my apples. Seriously. What were you thinking?

I hate shopping at your store. I hate it that I come to your store to purchase mega-packs of diapers and baby wipes and cosmetics and bathroom “stuff” because your store sells it cheaper than the other grocery store here in town. I hate it that I don’t have it in me to drag my children into and out of two different stores every single time I need to do the weekly grocery shopping. So it is likely that I will continue to patronize your institutionally gray aisles even though I feel a moral quandary every time I do so. Because at some point I may decide that the convenience you offer in the ability to purchase facial cleanser, storage totes, and cottage cheese all in one stop really isn’t worth the complete and total frustration I feel every time you uncaringly mismatch my purchases into your worthless little plastic bags.

Would you please go through your produce section there at your store and rid it of everything that has clearly passed its prime? From what I saw today, you could remove all of the napa cabbage, most of the apples, several heads of cauliflower, and a few crates of nectarines. For those of us who try to feed our families well and would like to take advantage of the abundance of summer produce, it’s highly irritating to have to pick through piles of brown, smushy fruits and vegetables to find the least tainted in the bunch for which to pay way too much.

It’s too frustrating to go on. I’ll stop here and kindly ask that the next time...you allow me to bag my own stuff. Because strawberries covered with street grime aren’t very tasty, and squished bread makes the most unattractive toast.

The 5- hour, 9-hour trip

2007-06-24T20:17:00.000-05:00

I just returned from a bachelorette party for my dear friend. It was held at her home, which is about 5 hours from where I live. There were so many things about this weekend that made me realize my age, like that I’ve been married nearly 9 years, I have two children, I’ve known my girlfriend - the bride - for fourteen years (because that’s when we started college, impossibly!), that I’ve had a driver’s license for (OMG) sixteen years (exactly half of my life), and that I can no longer stay out past midnight and be coherent, fun, and awake.

We had such a great time. It was so much fun to be in the company of the friends of my friend. They’re women that I almost felt that I knew through the stories that have been told by my friend to me, and they all commented that they felt the same way. In a sense it was as if old kindred souls were meeting for the first time to celebrate the one thing we have in common - our friend who will be marrying in a few weeks. There were women there from every facet and phase of her life - childhood, school, college, graduate school, working. It was strangely empowering and truly beautiful to be a part of this group.

Tonight I am tired from the drive home - a five-hour trip that took just over nine hours - and from the late night last night. I will go and rest in anticipation of the week ahead (doctor visits, storyhours, laundry, cleaning, playgroup).

2007-06-19T21:33:00.001-05:00

We’re full-on into week 2 of summer break. Week 2, and I have but 7 left before I go back to work for the school year. Something about that seems ridiculously unfair.

Last year I was so apprehensive about being home with the kids. J was so young and not so much into playing on her own or with her brother (that came about over the winter). A was independent, but not as much as he is now, what with his reading, computer games, bike-riding, and ability to operate the DVR (let me digress here for a moment. D purchased the DVR over the winter. I imagine that his original intent was to be able to record the old movies he loves to watch, or to save old sitcoms... and it did come in rather handy with Dancing with the Stars and American Idol... Well. I flipped through our saved list today. At 84% capacity full, there is not a single program for grown-ups saved. It’s all Big Comfy Couch, Grossology, Popular Mechanics for Kids (yes, we breed them geeky around here), and a couple kids’ movies.).

Anyway.

Today was really the first day we didn’t have a whole lot planned. I had a quick appointment in the early afternoon, but knew it wouldn’t take long. So we took off to the movies this afternoon (J’s first time). It was fun, if not so relaxing. I realized that it’s nice to just have the time to be patient with their whims and to give a little more than I feel I can when I’m working all day long. I even notice things about them that I hadn’t really paid all that much attention to...like J’s chubby little upper arms that call to mind her baby days even as her body grows taller and more lean, and A’s sprinkling of freckles right across the bridge of his nose and under his eyes, precisely where my freckles would come out each summer when I was his age. It’s not that I let these little things completely pass me by, but something about the long days of summer and the stretch of hours that we spend together each day brings a heightened awareness of their kid-ness.

-----

J was on the phone with my mother the other night. Completely out of the blue and unprovoked, she yelled “DOG FART!!” into the phone. Mom asked her to repeat what she had just said (as I’m peeing my pants), and she gets her little sing-songy voice on and said, “A is a fart-dog. A is a fart-dog...” After we hung up, I turned to D and asked him why kids do things like that...you know, pick some offensive word to use only on the phone with a grandparent... And J piped up as if to answer my question, “ ’Cause! Mimi is a grand-fart!”

She is so going to get suspended from preschool.

-----

A’s favorite pastime these days is taking the dog out for short runs around our backyard. In the event that the dog has to #2, A stops in his tracks and crouches down to get an eye-to-rear view of the action. It’s pretty funny.

Last night he came tearing into the kitchen to tell me that “There’s something interesting about Annie’s poop. Uh...it has corn in it.”

This is a child who seemingly doesn’t notice when a whole flipping container of Legos is strewn across his bedroom floor, but now he’s keenly interested in and aware of our canine’s bowel habits.

2007-06-17T21:53:00.000-05:00

We celebrated Father’s Day around here today. It was fun...D got his long-awaited new GPS (ugh...so incredibly geeky. But useful!) and I was afforded the opportunity to take a THREE-HOUR nap this afternoon!! It was 10-ways fabulous. I made a good dinner, complete with homemade strawberry pie, and then we made use of the new GPS on a ride out in the country. I love summer.

This Father’s Day I’m feeling an acute sense of loss. Since D’s dad died in February, we had no grandfathers to honor and celebrate today. This is the 12th Father’s Day that I spent remembering my own dad rather than celebrating with him in person, so I suppose that sense of loss has grown more dull over the years. I still miss him, perhaps even more so now that I have children of my own who will never know him, but I grieve more quietly now, and I try to make my every memory a positive one. When the kids and I went to the store and picked out our cards for D, I was nearly overcome in the checkout line with the urge to weep. I realized that we were buying one less card this year. And one less card means two grandfathers that my children will never really know. It seems a little unfair, if you ask me. It’s one thing that D and I are living without our dads now, but we were fortunate to have them into our adulthoods, and each was able to see their youngest child either achieve their success or get well on her way to it. I wish that they could see our children into their adult lives. As much joy as I take in dreaming about the future of my children and where their lives will take them...how much good they will do in the world...how much joy they will bring to D and me... I know it pales in comparison to the joy their grandfathers would feel.

So today we celebrate D... and remember our own fathers... and enjoy the things they would enjoy if they were here to celebrate with us. The strawberry pie, the long country drive, and the children who make them fathers and grandfathers in the first place.

The Joys of Small Town Life

2007-06-15T21:17:00.001-05:00

Our little town’s annual festival is happening this weekend. A is over the moon and every.other.sentence. out of his mouth is about going (!) downtown (!) and riding(!) rides(!). (This is where I would normally berate those parents who would actually let their children ride on portable fair-carnival rides, but that’s another of those words from my pre-parenting days that I swallowed long ago...)

The whole festival (truly) is centered around music, so there is a main stage set up right in the center of town. We usually end up there at the end of our riding extravaganza. Tonight as we were sitting there trying really hard not to listen to A ask for the umpteen-millionth time if he could just pleeeeeeeeeeeeease get a candy apple, our mailman stopped to talk to friends of ours sitting a few yards away from where we were. D told A to run over and tell Mr. Tony, our mailman, that “his head looked OK.” (Without breaking HIPPAA regulations, it appears he had a big lapse in memory not long ago. D sent him for some tests, and all appears to be well.).

So A went over and relayed the prognostic message and went on to ask if Mr. Tony would buy him a candy apple. Mr. Tony not only bought A a candy apple, but he got him some sort of crazy balloon animal hat thing, and he got a bag of cotton candy for J. I chuckled to myself, thinking that only in this charmed little small town life would I ever consider allowing my son to walk away with an adult to whom he is not related and never think twice about his safety.

However, I’m still trying to think of some sort of proper repayment for the mailman, since our kids bounced all the way home on their sugar rush...

2007-06-12T09:11:00.000-05:00

What is it with big sunglasses? I’m just wondering. Because right about now, I think they’re the world’s most ridiculous fashion trend.

I mean fine, if you want to look all Nicole Richie, go ahead.

Just pay no attention when I snicker at you.

Ten Years

2007-06-06T17:11:00.000-05:00

It really kind of freaks me out to realize I’ve been out of college for ten years. Because, seriously, how did that happen?

I have my 10-year college reunion this weekend, and I.CAN’T.WAIT. My girlfriends and I have been emailing and planning and anticipating for several weeks now, and I know when the time comes the weekend is going to fly by.

Here are a few statistics for what has happened to my 4 closest girlfriends and me since we left college:

4 husbands, one fiance
7 kids, one on the way
4 master’s degrees
at least 7 moves that I can think of, one overseas
somewhere around 11 jobs

That probably about covers it.

Pizza is on its way to our house. I just mowed the grass. 2 more days of school. Life is pretty darn awesome.

5 More Days

2007-06-01T20:18:00.000-05:00

I officially have but one work week left before summer. It’s a good thing...the kids (at school, not my own so much) are a little stir crazy and out of control. It doesn’t help that the last day in one of my districts was supposed to be last Friday, and in the other district it was supposed to be today. Right about now the fact that I had pretty much the whole month of February off doesn’t really make me feel better about still working.

My preschoolers don’t really seem to “get” the end of the school year like older students and the other teachers do. I guess time is just different to them. But every year at this time (even before I worked in the schools), I have a little bit of that end-of-the-year giddiness that I always used to get at the end of each school year.

Not so much now. I’m really looking forward to the summer with my kids, when the main goals we will attempt to accomplish revolve around getting J potty-trained and out of her crib, and teaching A to tie his shoes. I also have a couple quilts to make, and the entire summer will wind down with our vacation to MI. But getting through this last week is going to be no small feat. I have meetings scheduled every.single.day, a new student added on, and the prospect of cleaning up and leaving files in one district to which I won’t be returning next year.

It’s not giddy time around here. Frankly, I’m a little stressed out.

Overheard

2007-06-01T20:15:00.000-05:00

A was talking to his grandmother tonight on the phone. They’re making plans for next weekend, when A & J will be staying with her so that D & I can attend my college reunion.

A: It’ll be so fun to bring our dog.
D: A, you can’t take the dog.
A: Mimi, Dad says we can’t bring the dog. But we can bring J!

I Abhor Vomit.

2007-05-29T20:00:00.000-05:00

I picked A up from the world’s best babysitter today (yes, she’s ours, and no, I’m not biased. Hands down, this woman is THE BEST), and she said that he had thrown up this afternoon. We packed up the diaper bag and headed out to the car...and he threw up in the driveway. Like, bucketloads. It was awful. I immediately felt tremendously guilty for working in an area that has no cell phone coverage (even though D is literally right down the street...and even though D is the one A asked for when he puked the first time because, “Dad’s a doctor”), then I realized that the world’s best babysitter doesn’t call at the sight of vomit...she quarantines and waits it out. A got to watch movies away from the other kids, so he was pretty OK with it. I still felt smaller than small.

I hate vomit. I hate that when he went to bed tonight he was limp and clammy and all under-eye-circled. I hate that he kept taking in big deep breaths and sighing. I hate that now he has to worry about missing his last.day.of.preschool.ever. I hate that I’m exhausted but will spend the night worrying about missing his call if he needs me. I hate it when my kids are sick.

And meanwhile, I’m wondering...does anyone actually need one of these things?! Because, um, I’m pretty sure I survived my childhood without so much as an actual carseat, let alone a device to keep it cool...

And with that, she suspends herself from preschool...a whole year before she can go

2007-05-25T17:10:00.001-05:00

We went to A’s spring school program the other night. It was J’s first experience with that sort of thing, and we were a little nervous about how she would manage. A attends the Catholic preschool. The program was taking place in the church. We’re not Catholic. All are critical elements to the story.

We frequently talk about how much sass our little J-Bird has. It’s quite astonishing, really. She’s on her own agenda through life, and nuts to you if you’re in her way. When we left A in the social hall of the church to meet his class, J was adamant that she did not want to leave without him to go to the church to wait for the program to start. After a little fit, we made it out of the social hall and headed down the block to the church building. About halfway there, she stomped her foot and announced, “I NOT go to ’cool here.”

Which was only outdone by what she said once we arrived in the sanctuary. She looked around and spotted the Crucifix hanging above the altar. She pointed and said, “Hey Mommy! Look at that boy up there. His name is Pango.”

2007-05-23T18:27:00.000-05:00

One of my best and dearest friends is getting married this summer. She’s 32, has waited a long time, and has found a mate that is so right for her...well, it’s pretty wonderful. She’s the analytical type, your typical social worker, and because she’s a fabulously independent person with tremendous spirit and inner strength, I think she’s taking this step into marriage a little more seriously than most. Not that I advocate anything less. But she questions all the little things and is really taking to heart the commitment she’s making. She’s been seeking the advice of those of us who married shortly after college and have now been married 8, 9, or 10 years.

Today she sent me an email that said their wedding invitations went out today. I think it was nearly panic-inducing for her...she said it made her nervous to know that now all their loved ones would have those invitations in hand, and would be anxiously anticipating the day of their wedding. I kind of remember that day and those feelings, but for her it’s just a little different.

She said she needed to know all about the best parts of being married.

In thinking about how to reply to her, I thought about a conversation I had with my mom this weekend on the way home from my friend’s bridal shower. My mom has been a widow for 12 years now. I know that she misses my dad every day, in ways I can only begin to imagine. I told my mom that when D was away a few weeks ago, I found myself realizing that I take so much about him for granted. There were many times when I wanted to tell him something and I knew he wasn’t at the other end of an email or cell phone call because he was busy in meetings. I realized that I don’t really think about how grateful I am that he’s the last person I say goodnight to every single night, and the first person I see each morning. That he’s there to talk to each evening, that he’s able to manage any math question I throw at him, and that he keeps the Internet connection to our house working. He pays the bills. He calms the children. He recognizes when I’m at the end of my patience, and he makes me take a break. He encourages me to do and be anything and anyone I want to be.

Sure, I would survive and go on if for some reason he were no longer here. But life would be much less fulfilling and much more difficult.

On the lighter side of things, when I posed the question tonight at dinner for D to answer, he paused thoughtfully to think about what the best part of marriage is for him. While he was thinking, A piped up and said, “CAKE!”

Balance?

2007-05-22T19:25:00.000-05:00

Yay! A had his school program tonight. He did great.
Boo! A is school-age now and will be starting actual, honest-to-goodness school in the fall.
Yay! Dog is darn near housebroken.
Boo! Dog still requires walking. In the morning. 5:45.
Yay! Do you know...I’ve actually been able to read several grown-up books lately?
Boo! I usually fall asleep before I read more than a page.
Yay! We find out who wins AI and DWTS this week!
Boo! AI and DWTS will be all over this week, marking the start of a looooooong and boring TV hiatus that pretty much ends when OSU football starts. And that’s not til September.
Yay! College reunion in 2 weeks.
Boo! College reunion will only last 3 days.
Yay! Only 13 days left with students!
Boo! Still 13 days left with students!
Yay! Bedtime for kids!

2007-05-20T13:38:00.000-05:00

D requested that I begin using liquid fabric softener. After discovering that my washer (inherited about 3 years ago) has a liquid fabric softener dispenser, I went about trying to figure out how it works. Long story short, it had to be cleaned. Since I had no idea that my washer had such a thing, it has never been cleaned. We average about 6 loads of laundry each week. Multiply that by the number of weeks I've been washing without cleaning the dispenser, and perhaps you may get some sense of the nasty grossness I found when I pulled it out of its little housing.

There was a layer of slime, created by years of laundry detergent residue that's never been wiped away. On top of that was a thin layer, almost like icing, of little spots of mold. Mmmmm. Hard to imagine that our clothes were actually getting clean in a machine that had such yuck inside it.

To say I'm a little embarrassed is an understatement.

Mother's Day

2007-05-13T19:28:00.000-05:00

I truly enjoy Mother’s Day. For the last 5 years, I’ve felt like being able to celebrate Mother’s Day as a mother confirms my membership in some sort of club. It’s kind of nice. It helps, too, that D goes out of his way to make it a nice weekend for me. I’m pretty lucky as these things go.

We went to church this morning, where we participated in the annual Mother’s Day breakfast. The men of the church get together and cook a wonderful breakfast to honor the women of the church, and I think it’s fabulous. They serve us! I was particularly touched by what the priest said about mothers...that we are so important in shaping the next generation and that God bestows upon us special skills and abilities that allow us to nurture and shape and guide our children and families. “There’s no higher calling,” he said. And while I may feel that way on most days, it’s nice to hear that others recognize the loving work that mothers do.

2007-05-09T19:12:00.000-05:00

I had it out with a parent today. Those who know me know that it’s not really in my nature to show (or even have, frankly) any backbone. But I was not about to sit still and let someone tell me that I am not doing my job when in truth I bend over backward daily to serve my students. My principal told me I was “strong” and that I “did well.” And I knew I had the backing of the administration going into this meeting. But still...it hurts to the bone when someone calls my professionalism and clinical judgments into question.

What is it with parents? Fortunately, to this point, I can’t say I understand her situation from a parental perspective. I’ve not had to go to bat for my kids with the schools. I’ve not had to haggle through an IEP meeting or advocate for services or any of that. I can say with certainty, however, that I hold teachers and administrators and school professionals in high regard and certainly would not go in to face them in a confrontational manner when all signs point to the fact that they care about my kid and are doing their best to serve him. I would speak civilly. I would be respectful, even in disagreement. I would participate in give-and-take.

This is the part of the schools that I was dreading. And it’s just the first parent who is angry and upset at an inefficient system that no one seems to be able to change. And as much as I might like to think the issue is about me, it’s really not. I’m sure that over the course of time I will face many such parents...whose frustration and anger and dissatisfaction go unresolved, and for whom I can do nothing other than my very best to serve their children.

I can see it that way. Why can’t she?

The Little Man

2007-05-04T21:09:00.000-05:00

All of a sudden, A is just a little man. He rides a two-wheel bicycle, whistles, can do most of his bath by himself... it’s just like overnight he grew up!!

D is away on business. It’s precisely the third time since we’ve been together (10 years this summer, holy crap) that he’s gone anyplace for work...without me/us. It was originally a 2-day thing that morphed into a 4-day thing, then a 5-day thing. What do I have to say about that? Well, after 2 mornings of getting the children and dog up, fed, walked, pottied, clothed, cleaned up, and out the door... I’ve decided that unless he reeeeeeeeeally does something to screw up, I suppose I really need to keep him around a while longer.

If, however, he does manage to do something the screw up major, I get the kids. He can have the dog. She’s cute and all, but cripes...with the barking and the peeing and the chewing... at this point I’m thinking another kid would’ve been less work!

Not that I’m bitter or anything about D getting to go away and sleep in posh hotels for 4 nights...and not have to beg not to watch Night at the Museum one more time...and not have to change a diaper or take out a dog...and drag the trash to the curb...and make breakfast...and pick up toys and cat hair. I think it was really the comments about “Oh but the weather’s not that great here. It’s so windy the palms are just really swaying,” and “We had dinner on the hospital at Wolfgang Puck’s restaurant last night, but I don’t think you really would’ve liked what I had” and “Well, I had an upgradable fare, so I decided that since I didn’t pay for the ticket and I haven’t paid for anything so far on this trip, I could justify upgrading my airplane seat to first class.” Yep. Just go ahead and twist that knife just a teeeeensy bit more.

Two words. Pay.Backs.

2007-04-26T19:36:00.000-05:00

The dog and cat officially met this morning. I’ve gotten myself into the habit (and have shin splints to prove it, thankyouverymuch) of waking at 5:45 each morning to take the dog on a walk. On our way out the door this morning, she came across the cat. Now, the dog is becoming increasingly comfortable in our house. She’s also become more comfortable eating the cat’s food. And taking the cat’s space on the floor. And stealing all the attention the cat once got (which, admittedly, was very little. She didn’t really like hanging out with us when the kids are up and about). I had a funny thought on the way to work this morning. I envision the cat pacing drill-sargeant style back and forth in front of the dog’s crate during the day while we’re all away from the house. I figure she’s laying down the law for the dog, as far as the cat is concerned. “Now, furball. Here’s the way it works. The humans don’t like it when we pee, poop, or puke on the floor. If you’d like to keep your happy home, I’d suggest you straighten up your act. They’re only going to fall for that crap they read in the dog-training book about your bladder being small and immature for a little while longer. And when they put you outside, for cryin’ out loud, don’t bark! I’ve been waiting to go outside for 9 years now, and they don’t let me, and there you are trying to wreck your perfect arrangement of spending expanses of unsupervised time in the backyard by howling, barking, and otherwise being stupid. The food in the hallway outside the kitchen is M-I-N-E mine. I’ve been kind and generous in sharing it with you the past couple of days, but now you’ve eaten it all and I’m starving. So. If that happens again, I’ll demonstrate upon your face what exactly you’re missing by not having dew claws.”

“Oh. And one more thing. The big comfy bed where the humans sleep? I have free reign to go there at any time of the day or night. You, on the other hand aren’t even allowed upstairs yet. So let’s not forget our place in this family. Capiche?”

Yay Spring!

2007-04-22T14:18:00.000-05:00

The weather has turned nice again here the past couple of days. It has been wonderful to be outside with the kids and the dog. A has mastered 2-wheel bicycle riding, and when he's not on the bike, he's tearing around on his scooter. J is content to spend hours at a time on the swing. And the dog has to be the laziest puppy ever. Either that or she's collecting lots and lots of energy to use up later. Oh boy...

There are a few exciting things happening in our neighborhood this spring. Our neighbors on one side are here for their first spring and summer, so they're taking care of the outside of the house that has needed some TLC. They're newlyweds and it's fun to watch them planting flowerbeds together. It doesn't seem like it was that long ago that D and I were newlyweds (read: without kids!), doing the same thing here at our house. Our neighbors on the other side are in the process of painting their house. All of the houses here on our part of the street are old homes. They're all sided with wood, and they have slate rooves. Quaint, but lots of work. Anyway. There's an army of grown kids, friends, boyfriends, and family members next door scraping the old paint off the house. They've been at it for several weekends in a row. Last night I was out in the yard with A, and he was looking thoughtfully at the neighbor's house. He very sincerely asked me, "Mom? How long do you think it will take our neighbors to un-paint their house?"

Big News...

2007-04-20T05:26:00.000-05:00

A & J have a new playmate in the house. Her name is Annie. They are crazy about her. I think we’re just...well...crazy.

2007-04-18T18:55:00.000-05:00

I’m always surprised by spring. I don’t know why...I’ve lived in a 4-season state my whole life and annually go through the extremes of temperatures. So the warm sunny days of April shouldn’t really come as a surprise to me. But they always do.

This fact became evident to me today as I was leaving the house, and again as I was leaving my school around noon. It was surprising to me that I didn’t really need a coat today. And it was surprising to walk out the door at school to feel warm breezes and sunshine. After months and months of cold, dreary, gray days, I guess I had become kind of conditioned to it and the warm spring air just took me by surprise. It’s a lovely fact of life in Ohio. But I’d really not want to live in a place where it stays warm all the time. Uh-uh. Not me. (And if anyone tells my husband that, I’ll make them pay...)

----------------------------------------------------

Tonight at dinner A was done with his meal and was getting down from the table to go play...or take something apart...or watch this. D made him stop long enough to wipe his mouth off with a napkin. Not one to take the second it would require to get a clean napkin, A grabbed the one he had left on the table at breakfast. A one-inch section of the napkin stuck to the tablecloth, and the napkin ripped into pieces as he tried to pick it up. “Uh...yeah,” he says. “I had yogurt for breakfast. And waffles. With syrup.”

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Not that I advocate teaching toddlers to use language like this. But I absolutely laughed my a** off at this today. I sent the link to D, who said he had already seen it. He said he thought of sending it to me, but figured I would find it tasteless and shameful. Boy was he wrong.

Lovin' my Boys

2007-04-06T19:18:00.000-05:00

I was digging through mountains of clothes this morning, continuing on the spring break spring cleaning rampage. D and A left for a bit, and when they came back, A proudly burst into the room where I was working and handed me a wrapped gift box with this inside. It’s my new addiction, and D has only himself to blame for it because he started me on it. So yay! A new spring Vera.

Thanks, guys!

(And just an update on that cleaning thing. This morning I took 3 garbage bags full of clothes to donate, another garbage bag and a box full of clothes to consignment, and I have 2 overflowing bags full of hand-me-downs for a girlfriend. I feel pretty darn good! I also feel like I ought to go through the kids’ stuff more frequently than every five years...)

Amen, sister!

2007-04-05T19:50:00.000-05:00

Spring Break

2007-04-04T15:30:00.000-05:00

...and in less than 24 hours, the temperature has dropped forty (!) degrees and the sun has disappeared. Can you say...depressing?

D took the rest of the week off work. We decided to “do something fun with the kids” today. After long debate and discussion over what exactly that would entail, we decided on geocaching and a possible visit to in-laws. Geocaching was impossible at the first try, and just too damn cold at the second try. In-laws weren’t home. So, all-in-all, not a terribly successful day. But we did eat a pretty good late lunch together and everyone managed to keep it mostly in control at the restaurant (adults and children!). A spied some little quarter vending machines near the door of the restaurant filled with candy and asked if he could get some on the way out. I think it’s here that I ought to mention that we refer to the contents of these vending machines as “shut-up toys” or “shut-up candy.” I think you get the idea. So we told him that if he ate a good lunch, no problem.

So, good lunch eaten and good behavior all around, A got his wish. He surveyed the line of machines and chose the little m&m-ish candies, only with peanut butter inside. After he got his handful of candy, he said, “MMMMMMMMM!! These taste like recess!”

Cheaper than Therapy

2007-04-02T12:38:00.000-05:00

I’ve cleaned out two closets this morning. Like, reeeeeeeally cleaned them out. Threw stuff away, organized everything into bins, put everything back away in a nice, neat, organized fashion, and spent the remainder of the day wondering why we had 3 gi-normous EMPTY bottles of Tilex shower cleaner in the bathroom closet. I sent a HUGE pile of old coats and things to charity. I learned that our coat closet does, indeed, have a FLOOR. I decided that there is no longer any point to saving my twin extra-long sheets from college, since we have no twin extra-long people or beds in this house. I also organized all my stamps, inks, scissors and other geeky craft-type stuff.

Holy crap do I feel productive! I keep going into the bathroom and looking in the closet with its nice, neat sage-green bins of supplies and perfectly neat piles of nicely folded towels all stacked with the folds facing out...and wondering, “Whose bathroom closet IS this?”

I have only one thing to say:

He who makes a mess of my nice and neat newly-organized closets will pay. Dearly.

In case anyone is wondering, I’m on spring break this week. So is A. So he, J, and I have been hanging out enjoying the beautiful spring weather. This afternoon they ate their lunch in the treehouse part of our swingset, and they thought it was the best thing ever. It reminded me all over again how oftentimes the simplest parts of parenting are the most satisfying. I had only made them PBJ sandwiches with fruit and chips on the side...nourishment for the afternoon’s activities. But eating it in the treehouse made it very special, and they thought I was supermom.

A Weighty Subject

2007-03-31T19:56:00.000-05:00

This week I became increasingly aware (and annoyed, I might add) by parents. No, not my own. And no, not being a parent myself.

But I witnessed two incidents this week that showed me exactly why teachers and school administrators get so burned out so quickly. For a brief moment, I really felt helpless and as though I can’t do anything to help my kids (my school kids) when they’re surrounded by the negativity of their parents.

The first little episode occurred outside the elementary building where I work 3 or 4 days each week. A mother had shown up to pick up her son from school early enough that she was able to hear the principal’s afternoon announcements. During those announcements, the principal reminded students of the school rule and policy regarding shorts - that none are to be worn before April 1st. She warned the students that she would be issuing demerits for anyone who chose to break the rule. To myself, I thought, “Good for her!” Then I went outside to get in my car, where I heard this mother yelling into her cell phone (to whom, I don’t know) that her son would wear shorts whenever he felt like it and whenever she put shorts on him in the morning. Her child, along with several others, was sitting in the car next to his mom the whole time, hearing her completely inane rant. Never mind that there were 2 days left until April 1. Never mind that this was a school rule, not something dreamed up to single out her child. Never mind that in the grand scheme, shorts are hardly something to, well, get your shorts in a bunch about.

The second episode occurred when our neighbor girl brought over her homework from kindergarten, complaining that she hates school and can’t do the assignment. Her mother was close behind, going on about how she just can’t believe that in kindergarten they get homework and how ridiculous that is. That no kindergartener should have to take a proficiency test. And on she went. Right in front of her child. And mine, for that matter.

My whole opinion of education has changed significantly since I began working in the schools. I see how absolutely different districts can be (the two for which I work are polar opposites) and what a huge difference the school environment alone makes. I’m not sure where I come down on the issues of No Child Left Behind, proficiency testing, and graduation testing. I’m pretty sure that some such system needs to be in place...I’m just not sure we’ve gotten it right yet. But what could be wrong with holding students and teachers accountable and responsible for what goes on in the classroom (in ways other than telling them that they have to pass a test because the school’s funding rests on their scores...as happened to our babysitter)? I’m not saying that teachers need to teach for a test, but I am saying that they need to be held to a higher standard...to be creative and thoughtful about their work, and that presumably the test issues would fall in line.

Obviously this system doesn’t work for every child. Most of the kids I work with will probably never take a proficiency test or worry about getting into college. But these students represent a minority of the school population and I think that their needs could be met in better ways as well. Can’t we come up with a better way to include different learners? And back to my original issue...shouldn’t parents be involved and supportive rather than negative and adversarial? Isn’t there some way to impart the importance of education? Living in Appalachia, we see how graduation from high school is sometimes seen as “wow you got through it” rather than as a stepping stone on to something different. It’s part of the culture here, and while it may not be a good thing, it is what it is. I really feel like we ought to be expecting more, demanding more, and doing more. Of teachers, of schools, of students, and of parents.

It's Good to be a Buckeye Tonight!!

2007-03-31T19:51:00.000-05:00

One more down, one more to go. It has to be Florida. It just has to.

Any Plans for Dinner?

2007-03-26T18:21:00.000-05:00

Our conversation on the ride home today:

A: Mommy, can I go outside and play when we get home?
me: Sure.
A: Will you come with me?
me: I’ll be outside as soon as I put together the casserole for dinner.
A: What are we having for dinner?
me:...um...casserole.
A: Oh great. At lunch I didn’t even eat the casserole.
me: You had casserole for lunch? What kind?
A: Well...it was red and kind of cheesy on the inside. So I didn’t eat it.
--lull in conversation--
A: So. Are we having that kind of casserole for dinner?

Normal, I guess

2007-03-21T19:12:00.000-05:00

I heard this on the way to work this morning. In short, it was a piece about how working moms of today spend as much time with their children in “direct child-care activities” as stay-at-home moms did in the 1970’s. It turns out not to be as simple as that statement; indeed we’re talking two different eras. But it was interesting nonetheless.

I’m someone who feels incredibly strongly about choice for women who have children. I’m extremely fortunate to be married to someone who feels the same way. It doesn’t matter to me whether a mom works at home, works outside the home, or makes the home her work. It matters to me that she is able to do what she wants to do and what is the best thing for her and her family. I realize that not all women are fortunate enough to be able to make the choice to stay home if they want to, but I’m glad we live in a society where a woman is able to choose to go to work...and where women are able to earn a living for their families.

I’ve never felt particularly guilty about working. I’ve worked ever since A was 9 months old, and I’m confident that if I didn’t go to work, I’d be unhappy, grumpy, and a pretty unfit mom. I find satisfaction in my job. I worked hard for my degrees and I like the challenge of using my education daily. I like that people outside my house depend on me and my expertise in some other area besides diapers, recipes, and laundry.

The work I do here at home is incredibly important. Along with D, I’m responsible for the health, well-being, scheduling, and running of my family. And when it comes down to it, I never question which is more important - my family or my job. When my kids are sick, I don’t think twice about staying home with them. As A progresses into school (and J too, for that matter), I will make it a priority to be a part of that process. But when things are running well here at home (and perhaps even more when they’re not!), I need something else. Another facet, another responsibility, another depth. And I find that through my work.

I have many friends who have made different choices, and while we all question the choices we have made from time to time, it’s fascinating to me to see how well the choices we have made seem to fit all of us. I have friends who work full time, friends who work part time, friends who work out of their homes, and friends who are home full time with their children. And while none of us claim to be perfect mothers, I think we all would say we’re doing what we truly want to be doing. And I think we’re extremely lucky.

Tag!

2007-03-17T09:11:00.001-05:00

This was kind of fun. I “stole” this from here. It looked like too much fun to pass up. It’s a list of random things...the ones in bold are ones I’ve done. Things have been more exciting for me than I realize sometimes!! Of course, without college, most of my bold items wouldn’t have happened...

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children/currently raising child
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet.
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

Catching Up

2007-03-15T20:10:00.000-05:00

It’s been an interesting day.

I purchased a bridesmaids dress for what I assume will be the last wedding I am ever a part of. I’m thrilled and honored to be part of this wedding, but I’m stressing out about my flabby arms and post-pregnancy (2.5 years, but who’s counting?!) hips. I was pleasantly surprised when I tried on my usual size in the chosen dress and nearly fell out of it. Down a size was much better (and good for my ego too!). So that was that.

On the way to the bridal store, D and I got into another in a series of ongoing discussions about the education of our children. It’s been a constant source of stress and headache. A has been at the Catholic preschool here in town for 2 years. We love the school and he has had a fantastic experience there. It would seem natural for him to continue on there for kindergarten, and that’s what the current plan is. However, just because we have a current plan doesn’t mean I’m not constantly questioning the right-ness of said plan. In my mind, I’m weighing the issues of tiny class size, combined grades, the inability to continue Catholic education beyond grade 6 locally, and the question of the unknown against the moral and religious education he would receive, small class size, individual attention, and perhaps slightly more rigorous curriculum followed at the school. Then there’s the whole issue of the public school system here...where D graduated and where we know many teachers and administrators. There’s the issue of old buildings, larger classes, and the lack of the religious component to education. There’s much more choice involved, in terms of teachers. There’s the question of open enrollment possibilities at the elementary level. It seriously gives me a major headache!

The whole question of education frustrates me. D and I have differing views on it. I work in education and am even more confused and frustrated and worried for the future of my own children because of it. Beyond the basics of food, shelter, safety, and love, I think that an education is the most important thing with which we equip our children. So what to do if one is in a place where the educational choices aren’t what one wants...or if there is no choice at all? I talked with my superintendent in very general terms about this not long ago. I’ve come to respect him greatly, and I think he puts forth some valuable ideas. His children are nearly grown now and he said that when my children reach that point, I’ll look back and be amazed at how these things worked themselves out for the betterment of my kids. I took that to mean that things will work themselves out in no small part because of the work that D and I will do along the way. But I also took it to mean that eventually things will be OK for them...and for us.

One of my kids said something very funny during a session today. We work so hard on his expressive skills, and one thing he has particular difficulty with is defining words in a way that makes sense. So I was having him tell me three things he knows about any word I give him. So we did “shoe” and “dog” and other simple ones. Then I said “golf.” His three things? You play with a club, you hit a little ball really far, and you get mad.

I thought that was hilarious.

I AM a genius. I don't care what he says.

2007-03-03T20:02:00.000-05:00

Here at chez voiture, we've started using a system for managing the laundry. Not unlike any other family of 4, we go through lots of clothes around here. I hate doing laundry so much that I leave it all for the weekend, which ends up meaning that I leave it all for Sunday, which means it gets done about every two weeks on one awful Sunday when I do approximately 85 loads. Then I take it all up both flights of stairs to the upstairs where the bedrooms are...and there the overflowing baskets of clean clothes sit. We dig through them and remove clothes throughout the week, which leaves the baskets in a mess and the clothes with wrinkles. The whole laundry thing, start to finish, just sucks.

No more!!

I bought all of us a laundry basket. As in, I bought one laundry basket for each member of the family. Now the clothes are magically sorted as soon as they come out of the dryer!! I mean, holy crap!! Now it will take no time at all to put them away in everyone's room, and we'll avoid the whole step of spreading everything out in piles across our bed. I assume that as we grow even more accustomed to this system, we will actually use the same laundry baskets as hampers in the bedrooms. I am so genius!!

D likes the new process, but he's not buying into the idea that I've come up with something new. The other day he mumbled something about "I always hear everyone at work talking about how they do the same thing..." Hrumph. Perhaps if it were something that made us money...

Ugh. I've devolved into blogging about laundry. Hopefully things will get more exciting sometime soon...

Overheard

2007-02-26T17:22:00.000-05:00

“Aarrrrrgh... I knew having a little sister was going to be a big job.”

-A, this afternoon, while trying to get J to come downstairs and play when she clearly didn’t want to.

Catching Up...

2007-02-25T13:22:00.000-05:00

Last weekend was a blissful weekend...time away with D, a visit with one of my very best friends and her fabulous husband-to-be, and birthday cake made by my mom. It was wonderful. Then no school Monday (holiday), another, ANOTHER, calamity day on Wednesday (black ice and pea-soup fog), and meetings all day Friday. Altogether, not a bad week.

And I’m off to visit another of my very favorite people in a few minutes. She had a baby boy last Monday and I’m taking them dinner and gifts. I can’t wait to see the little guy!! Plus I figure a little bit of time in the unsure, bleary-eyed, what-day-is-it-again? upheaval of a house with a new baby should put to rest all of my recent maternal pangs of wanting just one more around here.

Here’s for Jessisca...a little info on big happenings at our alma mater a few weeks ago during the Valentine’s Day snowstorm. The tradition goes that if the archway of the main building on campus is filled with snow, classes will be cancelled for the following day since (oh so wrongly assumed!) no one will be able to enter or leave the building. It wasn’t such a big deal, I suppose, for this to occur back when we were students and this main classroom building was, in the words of my dear friend AM, a s***hole. However, I think the campus folks got a little crazy this time because the building just underwent an $18 million renovation. I think Jess will get a particular kick out of the “passionate pipers” element to the story.

Oh. And one funny before I go... Last night D and I left the kids with my nephew and his wife so that we could go to dinner. When we returned, my niece-in-law said that she and A were playing Go Fish. As she was dealing out the cards, he all of a sudden looked at her and said, “So. Whaddya know about Anna Nicole?” I didn’t know whether to laugh or be horrified. Finally, my addition to People.com is coming back to haunt me.

Not that Anyone REALLY Wants to Hear About More Snow Days

2007-02-16T13:12:00.000-05:00

...but here we are. This is day 11. But a much better snow day than the ones just past. I had some things I had to get done at school, so I braved the roads (HA! Not a lick of snow on them...), dropped the kids at the sitter, and went to work. Briefly. Seems that when school’s out for snow days, everyone takes them seriously and stays home. So I didn’t get everything done that I wanted to accomplish, but, well, there’s always next week. And I got the official year-end damage. We’re now up to a whole week longer than we were supposed to go in June because of these damn days off. So much for all my “neener, neener, neener...I’m done before Memorial Day” teasing.

We’re off for a birthday weekend away sans kids. Leaving tonight. Can’t wait. I’m also meeting one of my best friends from college while we’re there. Really can’t wait for that.

I guess I better go fold laundry. Or put it away. Or pack the suitcases. Or unpack the suitcases from the last weekend away. Or, perhaps, all of the above.

Number 10

2007-02-15T09:35:00.000-05:00

As in calamity day number 10. As in we’ve already got 5 make-up days in one district and (I think) 3 in the other.

I’m going freaking crazy.

And it’s not calamity enough to make us stay home, which is the kicker. I’m able to get out and do stuff I need/want to do, so we’re going to the mall to play in the play area and to see something other than the inside walls of our house.

Thank chocolate D is home this afternoon, or I might truly, honestly, I’m-not-kidding, lose my mind.

Maybe he’s right

2007-02-11T18:55:00.000-05:00

I like to tease D because he thinks he’s all weather god or something. We’ve got the beeping weather station in our room. He makes predictions like he’s been to meteorology school. And this afternoon he predicted that I will have precisely one (perhaps two) days of school this week on account of the big storm that’s supposedly headed this way. I told him I just didn’t buy it, that everyone’s making a big deal out of nothing. (Apparently most of the people in our town are buying in to the idea of something major coming. Wal Mart was about sold out of milk, bottled water, and bread...)

Anyway. I just checked the weather. Not only are we under a winter storm watch beginning Tuesday morning, but the words snow, rain, sleet, freezing rain, and ice pellets are all in the forecast for the next 2 - 3 days.

Ice pellets? That can’t be good.

Logic

2007-02-11T18:50:00.000-05:00

Of a 5-year old:

“I’ve heard that drinking lots of orange juice will make me strong and give me a fighting chance against germs. So I want to drink a lot of orange juice so I won’t have to wash my hands anymore.”

Of a 2-year old:

“I not go pee-pee in the potty til I wear my big-girl underpants.”

Ah. Now I see where we’ve gone wrong. We’re approaching all of these problems from the wrong angle. Perhaps we ought to let the children run the house.

What I Know Right Now

2007-02-10T19:47:00.000-05:00

...and things I’ve learned this week.

1. As in-laws go, I’ve got it pretty good. I’ve known that for a long time, but this week I learned that, after spending nearly every waking moment with one or another of my in-laws, I’m now in withdrawal after not seeing them for 24 hours.
2. My mom is right. I really ought to be a bit more mindful of what I’m wearing when I leave the house to go out in public. I think I’m well past the age where I can look all right going out in a t-shirt and jeans with no makeup on. And I can just about guarantee that when I do go out like that, I’ll run into people I know.
3. Snow days are nice. That moment in the morning, when I’m just beginning to think about getting out of bed, and my school gets called off...well, there’s little more exciting than that. However...snow days become a lot less nice when we use up our 5 allotted days and cruise right into make-up days. I didn’t sign up for this school gig so that I could be going to school in July.
4. Methodists cook better than Episcopalians. It’s a limited survey I’ve done, but the Methodists are out in front. Waaaaaaaaaaay out in front.
5. When given the choice between leaving plants out in the -ahem- cool van or bringing them in to the warm, dry heat of the house, opt for the house. Apparently plants don’t appreciate below-zero temperatures.
6. Chez voiture is in no way ready to get a puppy. Yes, the one that visited yesterday was a-DOR-able, and yes, he did sort of really like A. But the poop on the floor? Yeah. Not so adorable.
7. Dementia must be awful. I’ve been walking around in a foggy daze most of the last week. It takes me several minutes to figure out what day it is when I wake up in the morning. Between the snow days and the family events going on, I’m having a hard time keeping things straight. I’m hoping that gets solved when I return to school next week. Um...just in time for the next snowstorm.

Papaw, here’s to you. We miss you.

2007-02-04T06:39:00.000-05:00

Le grand-pere des Voitures is leaving us. It's a sad time for our family. We've been thrown into that strange suspended time where nothing really matters but the care and comfort of our loved one, and spending moments together. Everyone has been sharing stories around his bedside for the past few days, and even though I've heard almost all those stories before, it's amazing how comforting sharing a laugh about times past can be.

Having lost a parent at a young age, I've felt ever since then that I've somehow been hardened against the effects of loss. And grand-pere is old. We're finding some comfort in the fact that he has lived a long, full life that was largely untouched by illness up until the past month or so. But I'm finding that the loss of someone who means so much to my love's life is immensely painful. It's hard to watch him slowly slip away. It's hard to watch my usually stoic husband grieve.

It's been an unusual experience to walk through this process with our children. J, of course, is too young for attempted explanations. But A seems to understand the idea and appears to "get" what we're telling him, but only at that moment. The permanence of death is lost on a child of 5, as I suppose it should be. I feel so sad for our kids, that they'll only have met two of their grandparents, and that their memories of grand-pere will likely diminish over time since they are so young. I've looked at them differently these past few days. Their blue eyes, for which grand-pere is partly responsible, are more blue. J's resemblance to D's side of the family has become more obvious.

It's strange to me how we can pray for quick and peaceful end, but still wish with some part of our being (a selfish part, I suppose) that we didn't have to say goodbye. My childish being wants to believe that grand-pere is going to a place to be welcomed by those who have gone before. My adult being believes he will be whole again, and comfortable, and released, and at peace. I suppose we are now left to send him on with those thoughts.

A Stage I Can Only Hope Will Pass Quickly

2007-01-30T18:56:00.000-05:00

This is A’s newest “thing.” My brother-in-law (bless his - ahem - soul) loaned A this DVD. It’s all computer-animated music, and frankly I can’t stand it. When he’s got it on, I feel like I’m living in a video game. But he’s worked out this great setup in his bedroom: he puts the DVD on his computer, then uses two mallets made out of Tinkertoys to beat the hell out of his pillows. He’s got it down pretty well, I must admit. He plays right along with the little animated robot-things, in perfect time. And when they’re playing with only one stick, he plays with only one stick. I suppose it’s impressive if you can get past the sheer annoyance of it.

Vacation

2007-01-27T09:03:00.000-05:00

We're visiting my mom this weekend. It's fabulous. She cooks for us, doesn't let us clean up after ourselves or the kids, and she gives us a blank check for as many hours of free babysitting as we want. We could walk out the door right now and not come back until tomorrow...and she wouldn't care! Not that we're slobs while we're here...and hopefully we don't really take advantage of her. But it's really nice being here. Her house is very warm and cozy and welcoming, and there's so much stuff to do within a few miles of here (malls! Panera! fabric stores! movies!). We're going out in a little bit, after my second cup of coffee, then we'll be back here for naps (because the children slept precisely 4 hours each last night), then D and I will be going out ALL BY OURSELVES for dinner and a movie. OMG. I can't wait.

Snow Day 2

2007-01-23T14:03:00.000-05:00

So here we are again. I was up, dressed, ready to go...with dinner in the crock pot, no less...when I found out we had no school again today. S’OK with me, but I’m ready to go back and dreading the catch-up that’s waiting for me there...

Anyway. In an effort to kill time this afternoon, I took the kids to Burger King. I hate the food there, but they have the only indoor play-place in this town and they were both desperate to burn off some energy. So we went. After they ate, they took off from the table to go run and climb, and I was left sitting there listening to a couple of moms at the next table. They were having the typical mom-to-mom chat...one of those things that really kind of makes my skin crawl. I guess I feel as though I’m sort of beyond the new parent thing. I feel pretty comfortable in my role as mom, and while I by no means think I’m the perfect mother, I don’t really think I’m screwing things up all that much. But these two were discussing the ins and outs of the current stages their kids are in, and they were just regurgitating all these facts and hints from parenting books...enough to drive me crazy. Sometimes I even had the feeling that even they didn’t quite believe the things they were saying, but it was what they’ve read good parents do and say, so on they went.

There was a distinct feeling of “I’m superior” in their conversation. Their clothes were perfect, their kids were dressed perfectly, they were (I’m so not kidding) calling their kids over about every 5 minutes to anti-bac their hands. And the kids that were too small for the play area had an entire set of ocean creature toys that they were playing with.

I suddenly felt really self-conscious and small and so much like a bad mom. I only brought my kids to the play area so they could run around and wear themselves down before naptime. I didn’t even bring the diaper bag, so no anti-bac. I didn’t spend the time looking around at the other kids and comparing mine to them, and I venture to say that I wouldn’t have done that even if I had a friend there to talk with.

I do feel comfortable with the mom thing on about 5 days out of 7. I provide for my kids, teach them, keep them safe, and plan for their future. I think I’m doing a halfway decent job...they’re happy and bright and busy little kids who are respectful to others (ummmm...others outside the house...). I don’t know why it is that I let an overheard conversation like this invade my thoughts and become my obsession. I’ve said many times before that I don’t cater to my kids’ every whim...I’m firm when I need to be and there’s not a lot of cajoling and molly-coddling that goes on in our house. I want my kids to like me, but it’s OK if they don’t all the time. It’s just that whenever I find myself in a situation like the one today at BK’s play area, I’m suddenly thrust into a very insecure place. Am I doing a good job? Will they turn out OK by the time they’re old enough to fly this coop? Furthermore, will I be OK? Hm. I wonder.

Boogers

2007-01-22T19:26:00.000-05:00

(If that title won’t make me post more frequently, just to have it off the top of the blog, then I suppose nothing will!)

Bedtime conversation last night:

J was picking her nose. She does it almost incessantly, but mostly (I think) just because she knows it aggravates her father and me. She and I were snuggling last night before I laid her in her crib. It went something like this:

me: J, stop picking your nose! Yucky!!
J: (Quickly jamming her finger with the - um - freshly mined goods back up her nose) OK! I put it back!

Well, at least she didn't eat it. That will come in time, I’m sure, but for now...it’s our “well, things-could-be-worse” scenario.

Can you say...SNOW DAY?!

2007-01-21T19:47:00.000-05:00

I knew it would happen eventually. Hooooooooooooooray!! Tomorrow...no school! The best part is that I already know that tonight! I don’t even have to listen to the news tomorrow morning and wait...and wait...and wait...to see if my district(s) are closed for the day.

Sad thing is...Doug knew this would happen eventually too. Poor guy. He’s got to get up and go to work tomorrow.

Oh well! I’m free for another day!!

(In truth, I have a bunch of reports to write and work to do that I would’ve done tomorrow at school, but it’s extra nice that I can stay in my pajamas and do that work at home.) (And perhaps I’ll get to start my next quilt, make dinner early, and keep reading the book I got from the library that I’m devouring. I love chick lit!!)

A Question

2007-01-19T20:15:00.000-05:00

Does anyone else in the world loathe plastic grocery bags as much as I? I mean seriously. Whose asinine idea was it to package groceries in bags that don’t stand up in the trunk, can’t keep my bread and eggs secure, and require 8 times more than the traditional (read: much-preferred) paper bags? Furthermore, I wonder if back in the day, bag-boys had to go to bag-boy school, where they would learn how to properly sort and pack groceries into bags. Plastic bags completely negate the need for thoughtful packaging of the groceries that I spend $150 on each week. Today, my groceries were packed in the most haphazard manner. It took about 25 bags, which promptly dumped all over my trunk on the way home. My bread got squished. In one bag was the 8-pound chicken I’m roasting for Sunday dinner, along with a brick of cheese. In another bag were the week’s supply of freshly-ground coffee...and garlic. HELLO!! In another bag, all by itself, was a package of cookies.

And did I forget to mention that I ASKED FOR PAPER?!

I don’t mean to gripe, but seriously. The only other person in the world who I know is tremendously bothered by the rise in use of plastic grocery bags is a 70-something former engineer who used to go to our church. Does this mean I’m getting old?

I Can’t Even Watch

2007-01-08T23:24:00.000-05:00

The Buckeyes are losing. It’s 34 - 14 in the 3rd quarter.

I’m going to bed.

Because yes, frankly, it is that bad.

I Think I Can...

2006-12-31T21:17:00.000-05:00

I’ll make it. Just a couple more days. Life will be returning to “normal,” or what has become our sense of normal, on Wednesday when I go back to work and everyone goes back to their regular routines of sitter, work, school, etc. I was ever so thankful to be able to spend the holidays at home with my kids rather than going in to work at a thankless and tiring job. And when it came down to it, by the Thursday before Christmas I was more than ready for a break.

But this Christmas break thing really kind of blindsided me. I was all in work mode, and then - poof! - out of nowhere, two weeks off!! It was great to have the extra time at home and all, but I don’t feel like I was really “prepared” for it. Sounds pretty lame and ungrateful, I know. Especially since last summer, I felt pretty ready for the time at home with the kids. Maybe it was all the other stuff associated with this time off...the shopping, wrapping, planning, cooking, driving, hiding, preparing, and not sleeping. There’s not much of that stuff happening during the summer. Or maybe I can’t completely rid myself of the idea of work, since I’m going back in two weeks instead of three months. In any case, I’m ready to get back to it. Ready for the heinously crazy mornings and long “witching hour” afternoons. Ready to see my coworkers and the kids at my schools. Ready to get on with a new year.

Reeeeeeaaaaallllllly ready to put the Christmas decorations away. And to start on my reunion/wedding diet. And to think about some other resolutions and goals and things for 2007. As if putting the Christmas decorations away isn’t goal enough!

Who Says the Honeymoon’s Over?

2006-12-28T15:16:00.000-05:00

Just having celebrated our 8th anniversary in December, one might assume that there’s precious little we’ve not done or seen or experienced together. Well, let me tell you something...today we had two things happen that I cannot recall ever happening before in the entire time I’ve known D.

I woke up laughing at around 4:30 this morning. When I finally woke up enough to realize what was going on, I realized that my darling husband’s hands were all over my chest. I was laughing hysterically and asked what he thought he was doing. He sleepily said that he was just having a dream about making omelets and was digging through the cheese drawer in the fridge. He was disappointed to find that we “only had mozzarella.”

Just hours later, he had gone off to work and I was at home cutting quilt squares with this. On the first square, I sliced into my finger. I called him at work and told him I was pretty sure I needed stitches. I really only called him so he could move along and get home because my plan was to go to the ER, where I was sure they could just put some of that glue stuff on my finger. But apparently he had different plans. He told me to meet him at his office so he could “take care of it.” The kids and I hauled over there, where my -ahem- darling husband jammed a needle full of lidocaine into my left ring finger then proceeded to tie the wound closed with three stitches.

No, folks. You’ve not lived until you’ve been sewn up by your spouse.

I can only imagine what he’ll be cooking tonight in his dreams...

2006. Buh-bye.

2006-12-21T19:42:00.000-05:00

I don’t really expect that this will be my last post of the year, but I saw the format suggested on here, and I thought it might be fun. Here’s a 2006 retrospective, courtesy of the first line of the first post from each month in 2006.

So the holidays are now over and I’ve got at least a little time back to myself. No more sitting in a freezing basement wrapping presents for me, no sir. It was a wonderful holiday, but I’m rather over it now and am looking on to 2006. (OK, that’s more than one line, but it fits...)

It occurs to me that I’m perhaps the suckiest blogger in the world.

The kids and I spent the weekend at my mom’s since D was on call this weekend. We’ve decided it’s best for us to get out of his hair on those weekends when he’s unusually grumpy and gets a million phonecalls. (Again with the more than one line, but again, it fits...)

I don’t even know what that means. Whatever.

There are lots of things that I’ve heard people say about “you’re not really a mom until…”

I don’t know which is grosser...

So. Here we are.

Today was A’s first day back to preschool.

...for A not to be so funny.

I SO don't have time to be doing this, but hey.

---

Hm. That was fun. I'm debating now whether to do all of the Christmas dinner shopping tonight when I run to the store to pick up the stuff I need to make D’s contribution to his office potluck, or whether I’ll brave the sure-to-be horrible crowds this weekend. I’m thinking...that’s one thing to cross off the to-do list. It might behoove me to do it tonight.

On the happy side of things, I got my Christmas presents today!! Yay!! Well, I didn’t actually get them, but I took a step in that direction. I finally dropped off a cocktail ring of my grandmother’s that I inherited and have had sitting in my jewelry box for about 10 years. It was the god-awfulest looking thing in its old setting, so I’m having it re-set into a single-row band to wear with my wedding band and engagement diamond. I SO can’t wait to get it back!!

Today’s laugh came courtesy of the J-Bird. We were sitting at dinner, almost completely done. She had made it abundantly clear that she had NO intention of eating her vegetable soup, so D removed the bowl from her tray (lest it end up upside-down on the carpet, thank-you-very-much). There was a stray piece of celery left on her tray. She poked at it, asked “What’s that mean? It’s nasty!” and squashed it into her tray. Greeeeeaaaaaaaat. A two-year-old who says “It’s nasty.” We’re in for some fun teen years come 2017.

Observations and Musings

2006-12-20T22:31:00.000-05:00

I SO don't have time to be doing this, but hey. Christmas break starts tomorrow at noon, and I haven’t had a Christmas break since 1996, and I can cram a lot into those few days before Christmas. So what that I haven’t wrapped a single gift or made the dinner menu or attempted to clean my house? Fa la la.

Some things have come up in the past few days:

It occurs to me that I can gauge the general health and well-being of my family by the magazine rack at the store. Whenever I run to the pharmacy to pick up that prescription or those over-the-counter medicines or to sign my life away for a bottle of Sudafed, I always look to see if there’s a new quilting magazine to pick up. I realize on some level it’s pretty lame that I get excited over quilting magazines...and yes, that’s kind of sad. Sadder still that there haven’t been any new ones on the shelf for the last several weeks. No, no, it’s not the store’s fault. It’s just that I’ve had to go to the pharmacy way too many times in the past month and I’ve cleaned ’em out.
One of D’s patients told him today that he thinks I’m a good judge of character. Hm.
So A’s reading. It’s pretty amazing most of the time. Funny other times. Like when he told me he colored a whole picture at school and when I asked him what color it was he replied, “non-toxic.”
I wonder if there’s a way to figure out just how much space one needs in a house. Or one family needs in a house. Like, how much is too much? Is there such a thing? We’re entering what could become a heated debate around la maison de la voiture. Not that I want a billion square feet that I have to clean, but how great would it be to actually have a playroom to put toys where I wouldn’t have to step over them or on them or clean them up to run the vacuum because someone’s dropping by with Christmas gifts? You know. That sort of thing.
I spent way too many hours making our Christmas cards. They were cute, if I do say so myself, but now that they’re done and sent, I’m wondering if they were really worth the trouble. I don’t know. Anyone who is reading this that gets one in the mail, let me know what you think. If it makes people say, “Wow. They took the time to make their cards this year. They must really think we’re special,” then OK. I’ll start working on next year’s cards in February.
I just found out tonight that I’m going to be a great aunt. This will be our third grand-niece/nephew. I just think that’s weird, that I’m 31 and have been a great aunt for 7 years. Weird, but completely cool. Even though I’m so done having kids, and even though pregnancy has become something of a fearful event rather than a joyous one for me, I’m way excited for my niece and her husband. And I’ve already started thinking about the awesome baby shower I could throw in the house we’ve been eyeing (see above).

With that, it’s beyond time for bed. The kiddies are nestled, as they say, and from the snoring sounds creeping upstairs from the living room, I would say the mister is too. I’m going to enjoy some quiet moments while the electric blanket heats the bed I will crawl into very soon.

Where to Start?

2006-11-28T21:33:00.000-05:00

It’s my favorite time of the year. I love Thanksgiving. I love that I hosted several members of our family here for dinner and got to use our china. I also love that the day came and went and ushered in the Christmas season. I do love Advent and the whole penitential mindset in preparation for Christmas. I’m looking forward to getting our Christmas treasures out of the basement and attic and decorating our home. This time of year also brings our anniversary, so we are doubly blessed when we pull out our Christmas decorations...many of those things were given to us as wedding gifts and serve as a reminder of a wonderful occasion!

But it is busy. I have a list as long as my arm of things to do...and as usual I’m doing too many things that really should’ve been done months ago. Making Christmas cards, trying to make Christmas gifts for friends and family... not to mention the shopping for kids and wrapping and hiding...

But it’s fun.

Today I got a laugh courtesy of J. She wandered into the kitchen to show me that she had independently removed her pants (what’s up with that? Why do toddlers have a fascination with undressing?!). She asked what I was doing. I told her I was making dinner. She asked “Is it ice cream?” When I told her no, she said, “No. Oh! It’s soup!” She then went on, in true J fashion, to restate her discovery. “It’s soup! Mommy make a soup! Puppy, it soup! Mommy have a soup! I have a soup dinner!” And on and on, until her little pantsless self was out in the living room. I laughed because her little monologues are so cute and will continue ad nauseum until someone actually acknowledges what she’s saying, even if it doesn’t quite fit with what’s happening (or make any sense at all). I also laughed because in her little world, nutrition apparently boils down to two things. And if it ain’t ice cream, it must be soup.

Turkey Meme

2006-11-21T22:03:00.000-05:00

I’ve seen it elsewhere and feel the need to post, it being Thanksgiving and all. And a meme takes all the thinking out of it for me! Yay for that! I need all the help I can get this week. I love Thanksgiving. It used to be my absolute favorite holiday, but now that I have kids it’s edged out ever so slightly by Christmas. I don’t know...this whole part of the year really is magical. But here we go...20 things I’m thankful for. 10 “shallow” and 10 “deep.”

10 not-so-entirely-earth-shatteringly-important-things I’m thankful for:

1. All the yummy things one can only find this time of year. Peppermint coffee, pumpkin ice cream, etc.
2. The Buckeyes won the Big Ten outright and will be playing for the national championship. Let’s all breathe a collective sigh of relief that D wasn’t saddled with a major depressive episode after that game last week.
3. Our electric mattress cover and fabulous comforter.
4. Bibs, toddler spoons, sippy cups, Clorox wipes, and technologically-advanced laundry detergent.
5. Food Network.
6. A whole week off work!
7. All the modern conveniences that make life “that much” simpler: garbage disposal, super capacity washer and dryer, our really cool water heater, my stand mixer, dishwasher, and iPod.
8. The kids go to bed, both of them, by 8:00 every night.
9. Football season is so over.
10. The school year’s nearly half over, too.

10 pretty important things I’m thankful for:

1. D. He’s a great husband and father, a wonderful friend to go through life with, and a gem to put up with me.
2. A & J. For a million reasons I’m thankful for the little knee-biters. The experience of being their parent has taught me more than anything else I’ve ever done or been through. They bring just huge amounts of joy and levity into our home.
3. My immediate and extended family and in-laws. As these things go, I have it pretty great in all departments. A close family from which I came, and in-laws I can count on for anything.
4. The health and well-being of all of the above.
5. My education, and the sacrifices my parents and husband made for its sake.
6. The freedom I enjoy to work (or not work), to worship (or not), to move about freely and safely, to choose my leaders, and to be anything or anyone I please.
7. The increasing ability we have, through our own hard work, to acquire nice things for our home and enjoyment.
8. Our home and the sheltering, welcoming environment it provides, as well as the memories we’ve made here.
9. My friends and acquaintances.
10. The ability to recognize my blessings and be thankful for them.